Well, contrary to expectations about sub assignments during testing week, I’ve picked up three assignments for this week. A 2nd grade class today, 6th on Thursday and 5th on Friday to round out the week.
I wouldn’t designate the first two assignments “prime” because the 2nd grade assignment is at a school that has a reputation for “low expectations of social behavior” and the second assignment in a 6th grade class that I know has the same problem because I’ve experienced it twice already this year.
While most 2nd graders elsewhere are usually excited about school, think it’s fun and are respectful of adults. These 2nd graders lived down to the school reputation. In addition to being hard to control, one girl would constantly taunt others to start fights. “I don’t do homework and you can’t make me!” spouts the boy that just arrived mid-day from his “special classes”.
Just before lunch break, the kids were to line up and get a “small squirt” of hand sanitizer before walking over for lunch. I should have known better than to let the designated “squirter” kid handle what looked like a quart sized jug of the stuff to parcel out.
By the time I saw what was happening, several kids were lathering themselves up to their elbows and dripping it off the ends of all ten fingers.
This day could not have ended soon enough. All I could think of was decompressing for a whole day tomorrow before doing it all over again on Thursday…with the 6th graders!
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Monday, May 10, 2010
Silence of the Lines…
It’s the same every year about this time. Steady work all year and then suddenly the phone lines go dark. No phone calls, no automated request calls, no email requests from teachers…nada!
That’s when you realize it is mid-May and state testing for all the schools starts this week. All teachers are required on deck to conduct and monitor the tests. Subs need not apply.
Testing ends Thursday. I have an assignment for Friday.
That’s when you realize it is mid-May and state testing for all the schools starts this week. All teachers are required on deck to conduct and monitor the tests. Subs need not apply.
Testing ends Thursday. I have an assignment for Friday.
Thursday, May 06, 2010
Squirrel Head...
I just released the 2nd graders for recess and retired to the teachers lounge for quick Diet Pepsi break.
A few minutes later, one of the other teachers came in and said that a group of boys had found a decapitated squirrel head and were poking at it with sticks. When I started to get up, she said: "Don't worry, the janitor shooed them away and carried it off with a shovel". I sat back down and finished my drink. She misinterpreted my motivation.
Maybe it's a guy thing but I wanted to take a look!
A few minutes later, one of the other teachers came in and said that a group of boys had found a decapitated squirrel head and were poking at it with sticks. When I started to get up, she said: "Don't worry, the janitor shooed them away and carried it off with a shovel". I sat back down and finished my drink. She misinterpreted my motivation.
Maybe it's a guy thing but I wanted to take a look!
Monday, May 03, 2010
They Fooled Me…
I don’t have that gift for remembering names. Whether it’s a curse or gift depends on circumstances.
I’m doomed when it comes to remembering 20-30 names of kids in class that I have just met or haven’t seen for several weeks. Conversely, there seem to be hundreds of kids that know me by sight and name at all the schools I work
When I arrive on campus to pick up the attendance sheet and walk the gauntlet path to my assigned classroom, I’m always greeted by name by students waiting to be allowed on playground before school. I’ll wave back and respond with a non-committal greeting response.
This last month, I’ve been working in the same 5th grade class twice a week while the teacher is getting some kind of medical treatment. After the 2nd week, I could almost put names to faces of about half the class. Even if I couldn’t remember a name, I did recognize the face of every kid that belonged in this class.
It helps remembering names when you have to use them several times a day to get certain people back in the academic instead of entertainment frame of mind. Others I might remember for unusual physical features or characteristics. On the last week of this multi-week assignment, I went to the playground to “collect” my class for the walk to the classroom.
When I was in hearing range, several kids were telling me that they had a new kid in class. Sure enough, the second kid in line was a new face I didn’t recognize.
I said “Hello, What’s your name?” to the newbie boy who gave no response of any kind.
“He doesn’t speak English. He’s from France!” the kid next to him informed me. A quick look at the lesson plan had no notes about a new “French kid” or how I was supposed to work with him.
I’m thinking: “Great! Just great!"
Back at the classroom, I started taking attendance waiting to see which name this kid would respond to.
When I get to “Sam” and the kid responds with “Here!” I repeat the name again using the first and last name I know is absolutely not French in origin and belongs to a kid that doesn't seem to be in class today.
The French kid responds: “Hey Mr. Homework! It’s me! Don’t you recognize me?”
I’m clueless. If I have seen this kid before, I don’t recognize him now.
I take a closer look at “Sam” and remember that “Sam” was the kid I mistook for a girl on that first day because of his long, dark hair, gender neutral build and clothing. He now sports a short haircut and looks totally different. He looks like a boy.
Sam: “I got a haircut because I got tired of everyone thinking I looked like a girl”, he says with a big grin, “Did I fool ya?”
Me: “That you did, Sam. You got me! I just hope I recognize you the next time I’m here”
BTW: This isn’t the first time I had difficulty recognizing boys .vs. girls
I’m doomed when it comes to remembering 20-30 names of kids in class that I have just met or haven’t seen for several weeks. Conversely, there seem to be hundreds of kids that know me by sight and name at all the schools I work
When I arrive on campus to pick up the attendance sheet and walk the gauntlet path to my assigned classroom, I’m always greeted by name by students waiting to be allowed on playground before school. I’ll wave back and respond with a non-committal greeting response.
This last month, I’ve been working in the same 5th grade class twice a week while the teacher is getting some kind of medical treatment. After the 2nd week, I could almost put names to faces of about half the class. Even if I couldn’t remember a name, I did recognize the face of every kid that belonged in this class.
It helps remembering names when you have to use them several times a day to get certain people back in the academic instead of entertainment frame of mind. Others I might remember for unusual physical features or characteristics. On the last week of this multi-week assignment, I went to the playground to “collect” my class for the walk to the classroom.
When I was in hearing range, several kids were telling me that they had a new kid in class. Sure enough, the second kid in line was a new face I didn’t recognize.
I said “Hello, What’s your name?” to the newbie boy who gave no response of any kind.
“He doesn’t speak English. He’s from France!” the kid next to him informed me. A quick look at the lesson plan had no notes about a new “French kid” or how I was supposed to work with him.
I’m thinking: “Great! Just great!"
Back at the classroom, I started taking attendance waiting to see which name this kid would respond to.
When I get to “Sam” and the kid responds with “Here!” I repeat the name again using the first and last name I know is absolutely not French in origin and belongs to a kid that doesn't seem to be in class today.
The French kid responds: “Hey Mr. Homework! It’s me! Don’t you recognize me?”
I’m clueless. If I have seen this kid before, I don’t recognize him now.
I take a closer look at “Sam” and remember that “Sam” was the kid I mistook for a girl on that first day because of his long, dark hair, gender neutral build and clothing. He now sports a short haircut and looks totally different. He looks like a boy.
Sam: “I got a haircut because I got tired of everyone thinking I looked like a girl”, he says with a big grin, “Did I fool ya?”
Me: “That you did, Sam. You got me! I just hope I recognize you the next time I’m here”
BTW: This isn’t the first time I had difficulty recognizing boys .vs. girls
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Poo...
Twenty 3rd graders, forty shoes, one fresh dog poo; guess how many kids tracked it in the classroom after recess. One would have been more than enough, but FOUR??…
How was your day?
How was your day?
Monday, April 26, 2010
Privacy 101
I find that embarrassment is a pretty good deterrent to continuing distractions in the classroom. Passing notes instead of doing work is one such distraction I tolerate only at a minimal level. I warn the students that I read everything I find on notes being passed around or found on the floor. I even suggest that I might share a few of the more interesting ones out loud with the class.
“In general, if you want to keep it private, don’t do it in class.” More than a few haven’t taken me seriously.
Such was the incident in a 5th grade class last week when three girls were fighting over a tiny address book in the back of the classroom. After an ignored warning to “knock it off and put it away” I walked back and confiscated it, telling the owner she could have it back after class.
Returning to my desk at the front of the class, I made a show of opening the book, turning the pages, not really reading lists of names, addresses, Face Book handles and email addresses of classmates. Every now and again I’d make non-committal comments like: “Hmm! Interesting!, Oh, wow!” while surreptitiously watching the book owner squirm in her seat. After a minute or so, I believed that I had made my point, was ready close the book and place it in the desk drawer until the final bell.
That’s when I turned the page and saw it! The sudden shock or surprised look on my face must have registered or maybe it was something I uttered under my breath but the kid knew I had seen it.
There, entered on the next page was MY personal email address!!!
Now it was me that had that stunned, surprised and pissed all at the same time look. I didn’t want to overreact in front of the rest of the class. I simply looked at the book owner and gestured that she should approach the desk.
When she came close enough, I turned the page and pointed with a questioning look.
“Where and when did you get this?” I whispered, pointing to my email address. Her explanation was simple and direct: “From the paper on your clipboard. I saw it when you were helping me with rounding up numbers in math.”
Sure enough, I see that part of my contact information on the end of day status report has slipped just a bit beyond the bottom of lesson plan that is on top.
There wasn’t much I could do at this point but to but cross out the email address and warn the girl that I wasn’t happy that she had copied stuff that she knew she wasn’t supposed to have access to without permission.
I normally try to end blog entries with clever quips or a summation phrase but…nothing comes to mind for this one.
Still stunned and pissed I guess.
“In general, if you want to keep it private, don’t do it in class.” More than a few haven’t taken me seriously.
Such was the incident in a 5th grade class last week when three girls were fighting over a tiny address book in the back of the classroom. After an ignored warning to “knock it off and put it away” I walked back and confiscated it, telling the owner she could have it back after class.
Returning to my desk at the front of the class, I made a show of opening the book, turning the pages, not really reading lists of names, addresses, Face Book handles and email addresses of classmates. Every now and again I’d make non-committal comments like: “Hmm! Interesting!, Oh, wow!” while surreptitiously watching the book owner squirm in her seat. After a minute or so, I believed that I had made my point, was ready close the book and place it in the desk drawer until the final bell.
That’s when I turned the page and saw it! The sudden shock or surprised look on my face must have registered or maybe it was something I uttered under my breath but the kid knew I had seen it.
There, entered on the next page was MY personal email address!!!
Now it was me that had that stunned, surprised and pissed all at the same time look. I didn’t want to overreact in front of the rest of the class. I simply looked at the book owner and gestured that she should approach the desk.
When she came close enough, I turned the page and pointed with a questioning look.
“Where and when did you get this?” I whispered, pointing to my email address. Her explanation was simple and direct: “From the paper on your clipboard. I saw it when you were helping me with rounding up numbers in math.”
Sure enough, I see that part of my contact information on the end of day status report has slipped just a bit beyond the bottom of lesson plan that is on top.
There wasn’t much I could do at this point but to but cross out the email address and warn the girl that I wasn’t happy that she had copied stuff that she knew she wasn’t supposed to have access to without permission.
I normally try to end blog entries with clever quips or a summation phrase but…nothing comes to mind for this one.
Still stunned and pissed I guess.
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Revealed?
I had always assumed that the teachers I work for have no interest, inclination or time to read blogs; especially those by substitute teachers.
I say “had” because I received an email request to sub addressed, not to the published email address I leave for teachers, but to the blogger email address.
I guess it had to happen sooner or later…or had it?
The email, I later discovered, came from another substitute teacher working in the same district. She needed to locate someone to cover the last hour of a class due to an overlapping commitment elsewhere. As it turned out, I was working only a half day at a different school was able to oblige. The little extra cash for extending my lunch hour before I went home was a good deal.
I asked how she ended up with the blogger email address and it was immediately obvious. She knew my name and that I was subbing frequently at the school. Google connected the two search phrases and it provided her with the blog site. After reading a few posts, she was sure she knew she had the right guy before contacting me.
Would teachers tell me if they found the blog? Would I suddenly see a drop off in assignments? Would I be blackballed if the district took notice? Am I worried enough to stop writing or change what I write about?
The answers: I don’t know; It could happen; Possibility; …and Not really.
There are several other districts in the area I can work for if that happened.
I say “had” because I received an email request to sub addressed, not to the published email address I leave for teachers, but to the blogger email address.
I guess it had to happen sooner or later…or had it?
The email, I later discovered, came from another substitute teacher working in the same district. She needed to locate someone to cover the last hour of a class due to an overlapping commitment elsewhere. As it turned out, I was working only a half day at a different school was able to oblige. The little extra cash for extending my lunch hour before I went home was a good deal.
I asked how she ended up with the blogger email address and it was immediately obvious. She knew my name and that I was subbing frequently at the school. Google connected the two search phrases and it provided her with the blog site. After reading a few posts, she was sure she knew she had the right guy before contacting me.
Would teachers tell me if they found the blog? Would I suddenly see a drop off in assignments? Would I be blackballed if the district took notice? Am I worried enough to stop writing or change what I write about?
The answers: I don’t know; It could happen; Possibility; …and Not really.
There are several other districts in the area I can work for if that happened.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Free Field Trip?
Every now and again I get email wanting to publicize a product or school relate function on the blog. I rarely accommodate the request unless I think I think it's "cool enough".
I'll let you guys vote -- yes/no in the comments section. Is this a program any teacher would be interested enough to investigate further?
(see the link to lunchables.com for further info)
"........
I think you and your readers might be interested in a project I’m working on for Field Trips.
Did you know that the American Assoc. of school administrators predicts that the number of school districts eliminating field trips will increase by 56 percent, or more than 30,000 schools?
My client, Lunchables, recently announced a new campaign to help deserving kids go on education and inspiring field trip adventures, called “Field trips for All.” They’ll be sending 50 classrooms nationwide on unforgettable field trips. Anyone can nominate a classroom to win a field trip on Lunchables.com through June 1!
To kick off the program, we took one lucky class of fifth graders on a field trip where they came face to face with some out-of-this-world creatures…check out this video to see what went down! I hope you’ll take a moment to nominate your classroom to win a field trip or let your readers know how they can get involved.
…Tuesday, April 06, 2010
School Assemby Programs...
The “school assembly” is the equivalent of the “all hands meeting” in the corporate world. Everyone is required to attend; it isn’t an option. It’s also rarely of any value to the attendees and a big disruption to any actual work getting accomplished.
Come to think of it, that may have been the turning point in my previous career, when at one such meeting soliciting suggestions to boost productivity in the work place, that my pointed suggestion to schedule fewer “meaningless meetings” was not favorably received.
But that’s another story.
The school assembly seems to come in two varieties. The school sponsored rallies like spirit day, fund raisers, and school awards are pretty much choreographed, tame events. The PTA and other parent group sponsored assembly programs bring in an outside professional “performance” for the kids. These performances promote principles like character building, anti-bullying, anti-drugs, eating healthy, stranger danger…etc.
The job of the substitute teacher at these events is usually to sit on a hard metal folding chair at the side and look menacingly in the direction of anyone who is overly disruptive to others around him/her.
Every once in a while the “audience participation”, especially in the lower grades, will surprise the teachers and the actors with an unexpected response to the performance.
So it was, during a last minute switch of class assignments to 6th grade last week and no lesson plan, that the principal instructed me to take the class to the morning PTA assembly for the lower grades. His reasoning was that it would allow me 45mins to review the daily lesson plan he’d be obtaining shortly.
“Just have them sit in the back, behind the 3rd graders.”
The male and female acting duo were presenting the “Arthurian Legend” incorporating the British characters and legends of Merlin, Arthur, Morgana, Sword in the Stone, Templar Knights, the Holy Grail and who knows what else…
I was going over the lesson plan with only partial attention to the stage.
By the sounds of laughter from the audience, the young kids were having a great time with the story. A quick look over at my 6th graders revealed bored, mild attentiveness. Back to the plan!
A shout of “Stab her!!” interrupted my plan review.
On stage, the Templar knight with raised sword was standing over a cowering figure of the witch Morgana .
A second later, the teachers on the other side of the room suddenly came to life as two 2nd graders were on their feet, fist pumping in the air and chanting “Kill her, Kill her…” while other 2nd graders were trying to pull the pair back down into a seated position.
The teachers moved into the crowd and restored order. The play resumed with the “witch problem” taken care of “non-fatally”.
The 6th graders, previously bored to tears, were now highly entertained by the excitement.
If “kid mob” mayhem is what excites 6th graders today, maybe I could suggest the book: “Lord of the Flies” for this group?…
Come to think of it, that may have been the turning point in my previous career, when at one such meeting soliciting suggestions to boost productivity in the work place, that my pointed suggestion to schedule fewer “meaningless meetings” was not favorably received.
But that’s another story.
The school assembly seems to come in two varieties. The school sponsored rallies like spirit day, fund raisers, and school awards are pretty much choreographed, tame events. The PTA and other parent group sponsored assembly programs bring in an outside professional “performance” for the kids. These performances promote principles like character building, anti-bullying, anti-drugs, eating healthy, stranger danger…etc.
The job of the substitute teacher at these events is usually to sit on a hard metal folding chair at the side and look menacingly in the direction of anyone who is overly disruptive to others around him/her.
Every once in a while the “audience participation”, especially in the lower grades, will surprise the teachers and the actors with an unexpected response to the performance.
So it was, during a last minute switch of class assignments to 6th grade last week and no lesson plan, that the principal instructed me to take the class to the morning PTA assembly for the lower grades. His reasoning was that it would allow me 45mins to review the daily lesson plan he’d be obtaining shortly.
“Just have them sit in the back, behind the 3rd graders.”
The male and female acting duo were presenting the “Arthurian Legend” incorporating the British characters and legends of Merlin, Arthur, Morgana, Sword in the Stone, Templar Knights, the Holy Grail and who knows what else…
I was going over the lesson plan with only partial attention to the stage.
By the sounds of laughter from the audience, the young kids were having a great time with the story. A quick look over at my 6th graders revealed bored, mild attentiveness. Back to the plan!
A shout of “Stab her!!” interrupted my plan review.
On stage, the Templar knight with raised sword was standing over a cowering figure of the witch Morgana .
A second later, the teachers on the other side of the room suddenly came to life as two 2nd graders were on their feet, fist pumping in the air and chanting “Kill her, Kill her…” while other 2nd graders were trying to pull the pair back down into a seated position.
The teachers moved into the crowd and restored order. The play resumed with the “witch problem” taken care of “non-fatally”.
The 6th graders, previously bored to tears, were now highly entertained by the excitement.
If “kid mob” mayhem is what excites 6th graders today, maybe I could suggest the book: “Lord of the Flies” for this group?…
Saturday, April 03, 2010
The Pledge...
I just wish students and even OUR OWN government knew the meaning of "Pledge of Allegiance" as well as Red did. We'd all be better off...
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Being Flexible…
Friday was the last day of a three day, pre-arranged assignment for a teacher I really like in a class I really like. The first two days it was actually fun to be there. The teacher had laid out detailed plans with books and materials logically arranged. Since I was to be there for three consecutive days, I even had the advantage of reviewing the next day’s plan before I left the classroom.
Friday, I arrived for my last day of this assignment to a school office in chaos. Thirty percent (10) of the teachers were out and they were scrambling to find subs to fill the last minute sick calls. I was SO glad I already had a class that I knew I was prepared for, a class I knew I wouldn’t have any problems with and that was “fun” to be with.
That was before the principal tracked me down while I was on morning yard duty.
“We’re having problems lining up enough subs for all the teachers that are out today. I’m trying to shift people around and I need you to sub for Ms. N in 6th today. I’ll cover your 5th grade class for the first hour until the sub I lined up for your class gets here.”
My questioning look must have conveyed my wounded confusion.
If you have a sub coming in an hour late and you are going to cover the first hour why does that involve me moving from a great 5th grade class to a 6th grade class where I know there are no plans, is a class known to be the same or worse than the one I previously described as the “day I quit” while she gets MY primo class?
As explained by prince, this sub normally only works K-3rd graders and was reluctant to agree to work with 6th graders. In desperation the prince promised he’d arrange it so she would not have to deal with “big scary kids”.
His solution was to give ME the “big scary kids” and hand over my fun class because: “You’re a guy and I know you can handle them”. As it turned out “handle” is a synonym for “survive”.
Sometimes it doesn’t pay to be flexible…
Update: 03/31/2010
I was at the school and met with the teacher of my aborted three day assignment. She related that the Friday I was switched to 6th, her kids had the school psychologist for the first part of the morning, a sub for the rest of the morning and a different sub for the afternoon! She described her kids’ reactions of that day as “disorienting” at best.
In reality, I thought the school psychologist should have taken my 6th graders for the whole day. She probably could have written a couple of books on “abhorrent childhood behavior” from that one experience alone.
Friday, I arrived for my last day of this assignment to a school office in chaos. Thirty percent (10) of the teachers were out and they were scrambling to find subs to fill the last minute sick calls. I was SO glad I already had a class that I knew I was prepared for, a class I knew I wouldn’t have any problems with and that was “fun” to be with.
That was before the principal tracked me down while I was on morning yard duty.
“We’re having problems lining up enough subs for all the teachers that are out today. I’m trying to shift people around and I need you to sub for Ms. N in 6th today. I’ll cover your 5th grade class for the first hour until the sub I lined up for your class gets here.”
My questioning look must have conveyed my wounded confusion.
If you have a sub coming in an hour late and you are going to cover the first hour why does that involve me moving from a great 5th grade class to a 6th grade class where I know there are no plans, is a class known to be the same or worse than the one I previously described as the “day I quit” while she gets MY primo class?
As explained by prince, this sub normally only works K-3rd graders and was reluctant to agree to work with 6th graders. In desperation the prince promised he’d arrange it so she would not have to deal with “big scary kids”.
His solution was to give ME the “big scary kids” and hand over my fun class because: “You’re a guy and I know you can handle them”. As it turned out “handle” is a synonym for “survive”.
Sometimes it doesn’t pay to be flexible…
Update: 03/31/2010
I was at the school and met with the teacher of my aborted three day assignment. She related that the Friday I was switched to 6th, her kids had the school psychologist for the first part of the morning, a sub for the rest of the morning and a different sub for the afternoon! She described her kids’ reactions of that day as “disorienting” at best.
In reality, I thought the school psychologist should have taken my 6th graders for the whole day. She probably could have written a couple of books on “abhorrent childhood behavior” from that one experience alone.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
The Day I Quit…
It happened to me last week in a 6th grade class. I’ve worked with this class before when they were 4th and 5th graders. Nothing has changed. If anything it’s gotten even worse.
This class behaves as if every school day is a party day. That’s not to say that everyone in the class behaves this way, but when a good 80% of the class is in full time party mode, the other 20% disappear in the chaos.
After several attempts to get them into the mysteries of bar graphs and histograms for the math lesson, I gave up.
“I see we aren’t going to get much done today so…the text book page for today’s Math is on page 221. Read it yourself and figure it out on your own. The homework assignment is on the board. If anyone has any questions, you can come to the back of the room where I’ll help those who are motivated to do so. I’ll let your teacher know that she’ll probably have to repeat this lesson tomorrow since it isn’t happening today.”
With that, I went back to the teacher’s desk in the back of the room and sat down…waiting to see what affect that had on the class. None!
Not one student came to the back for questions or help. In detailing the events of the day for the teacher to review, I included a note that she would probably have to redo most of the day’s lessons.
“Sorry I couldn’t do a better job for you” was my closing line on the end of day report.
I met the teacher in the teacher’s lounge a couple of days later. She apologized to me for her class and said they are like that for her also and it’s not just an act they put on for subs.
In asking why the school hasn’t tried to break up this group into different classes, she told me that ALL the 6th grade classes are like hers if not worse.
At least I can take a day off after an experience like that. The teacher isn’t so fortunate.
This class behaves as if every school day is a party day. That’s not to say that everyone in the class behaves this way, but when a good 80% of the class is in full time party mode, the other 20% disappear in the chaos.
After several attempts to get them into the mysteries of bar graphs and histograms for the math lesson, I gave up.
“I see we aren’t going to get much done today so…the text book page for today’s Math is on page 221. Read it yourself and figure it out on your own. The homework assignment is on the board. If anyone has any questions, you can come to the back of the room where I’ll help those who are motivated to do so. I’ll let your teacher know that she’ll probably have to repeat this lesson tomorrow since it isn’t happening today.”
With that, I went back to the teacher’s desk in the back of the room and sat down…waiting to see what affect that had on the class. None!
Not one student came to the back for questions or help. In detailing the events of the day for the teacher to review, I included a note that she would probably have to redo most of the day’s lessons.
“Sorry I couldn’t do a better job for you” was my closing line on the end of day report.
I met the teacher in the teacher’s lounge a couple of days later. She apologized to me for her class and said they are like that for her also and it’s not just an act they put on for subs.
In asking why the school hasn’t tried to break up this group into different classes, she told me that ALL the 6th grade classes are like hers if not worse.
At least I can take a day off after an experience like that. The teacher isn’t so fortunate.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Persnickety…
Having students “read out loud” is sometimes very painful.
Readers that are painfully slow as they try to decipher words that they should know by 5th and 6th grade, painfully hard to listen to as they mutter monotone throughout the section or read machine-gunned words nonstop with no consideration for punctuation marks or spaces between words.
“Here’s a tip!” I suggested to one machinegun boy, “When you come to a period or question mark, take a breath before continuing. All that got me was exaggerated inhale-exhale sound effects at the end of every sentence to the amusement of the rest of the class.
At least I know he’s reading!
When time starts getting tight and I know they have a worksheet or practice book page to complete for the reading session, I’ll sometimes take over the reading and let them follow along.
In reading an essay about Alaska’s grizzly bears, I was attempting to cover the last three pages of the story to allow them time to complete the associated practice book page.
“….in the Unites States…( “LOWER Unites States!” interrupted the buzz cut kid on my left)…uh, yes! You are right…in the lower United States…blah, blah, blah…one day...( “one AUTUMN day!” (buzz cut kid again)…(me with a baleful look: “right again!...one autumn day …blah, blah, blah…you don’t want to bump heads with a bear while berry picking...( BC: “BLUEBERRY picking!”)…
At this point, the girl across the table told him that he was being rude and to knock it off. “Yea, quit being so persnickety!” her friend chided in.
After giving an impressed, approving look at persnickety-girl, for using that totally unexpected unusual word in correct context, I addressed the class.
Yes it IS a bit rude to correct the teacher while reading, but I DID skip some words. At least I know he’s reading along, even if it’s only to spot my next mistake.
As soon as I said it, I knew I’d regret it.
As I read the last few pages at a slower pace to make absolutely sure I didn’t skip any words, thirty kids were focused on the text, word by word, line by line to see who could be the first detect my next error.
At least I know they’re reading!
Readers that are painfully slow as they try to decipher words that they should know by 5th and 6th grade, painfully hard to listen to as they mutter monotone throughout the section or read machine-gunned words nonstop with no consideration for punctuation marks or spaces between words.
“Here’s a tip!” I suggested to one machinegun boy, “When you come to a period or question mark, take a breath before continuing. All that got me was exaggerated inhale-exhale sound effects at the end of every sentence to the amusement of the rest of the class.
At least I know he’s reading!
When time starts getting tight and I know they have a worksheet or practice book page to complete for the reading session, I’ll sometimes take over the reading and let them follow along.
In reading an essay about Alaska’s grizzly bears, I was attempting to cover the last three pages of the story to allow them time to complete the associated practice book page.
“….in the Unites States…( “LOWER Unites States!” interrupted the buzz cut kid on my left)…uh, yes! You are right…in the lower United States…blah, blah, blah…one day...( “one AUTUMN day!” (buzz cut kid again)…(me with a baleful look: “right again!...one autumn day …blah, blah, blah…you don’t want to bump heads with a bear while berry picking...( BC: “BLUEBERRY picking!”)…
At this point, the girl across the table told him that he was being rude and to knock it off. “Yea, quit being so persnickety!” her friend chided in.
After giving an impressed, approving look at persnickety-girl, for using that totally unexpected unusual word in correct context, I addressed the class.
Yes it IS a bit rude to correct the teacher while reading, but I DID skip some words. At least I know he’s reading along, even if it’s only to spot my next mistake.
As soon as I said it, I knew I’d regret it.
As I read the last few pages at a slower pace to make absolutely sure I didn’t skip any words, thirty kids were focused on the text, word by word, line by line to see who could be the first detect my next error.
At least I know they’re reading!
Friday, March 05, 2010
Flemmy Loogies
I worked only two half-day assignments this week. Took myself off the sub list for today to go out and find me some drugs for the hacking-cough-flemmy-loogie thing that’s going around.
Several people I know have had it for a month or more. At Claudette's suggestion I tried Mucinex-D and seems to get me through the night and the next morning. I just hope it gets me through four subbing assignments starting Monday.
I would have taken myself off the list for the next week, but a teacher actually begged me to take her class for two days. She insisted they were a great class.
Wanting to say "no", I agreed figuring I'd still have the rest of the week off.
Then I get a call the next day at home from another teacher at the same school: "I know you're already subbing for Ms. F on Mon/Tues so can I have you for Wed/Thur?"
Now how is it going to look at this point if I already said "yes" to one and "no" to her friend?
So now I'm working MOST of next week and counting pills to see if I can make it through to next Friday.
I wonder how many boxes of the stuff I can buy before the government thinks I’m a PCP chemist?
Several people I know have had it for a month or more. At Claudette's suggestion I tried Mucinex-D and seems to get me through the night and the next morning. I just hope it gets me through four subbing assignments starting Monday.
I would have taken myself off the list for the next week, but a teacher actually begged me to take her class for two days. She insisted they were a great class.
Wanting to say "no", I agreed figuring I'd still have the rest of the week off.
Then I get a call the next day at home from another teacher at the same school: "I know you're already subbing for Ms. F on Mon/Tues so can I have you for Wed/Thur?"
Now how is it going to look at this point if I already said "yes" to one and "no" to her friend?
So now I'm working MOST of next week and counting pills to see if I can make it through to next Friday.
I wonder how many boxes of the stuff I can buy before the government thinks I’m a PCP chemist?
Monday, March 01, 2010
Friday, February 26, 2010
Science, Fair?
There are several things that will distract me in the classroom but, by far, the topmost irritant is the plastic water bottle that seems to populate every desk in every grade.
Now, it’s not the bottle itself or the kid sneaking an occasional drink during class that bothers me. It is kids playing with and making “crackling” noises during class that will get my unwelcome attention.
If I stop the lesson and laser sight the “bottle cracker”, he/she will eventually notice and will slowly remove it from the desktop, stashing it of sight.
If they are really into the bottle music thing and absolutely clueless to their surroundings, it takes the other kids at the table to prod the kid’s attention back to the front of the room where he/she discovers that I’m intently staring directly at them.
The bottle disappears.
So it was in a 2nd grade classroom yesterday that a tiny girl bottle cracker (aka: BC) got my attention. After asking that the bottle be put away, “BC” blurts: “But it’s my science fair spearmint!!”
I looked a bit more closely and saw that one bottle was 1/3 filled with dirt and some leaf bits on top. The other looked like it had about the same amount of cloudy water.
Me: That’s nice but let’s not play with the bottles during class, ok?
BC: It’s about worms!
Me: We’re supposed to be doing math right now. Maybe we’ll have time for science fair later.
BC: See! Worms live in wet dirt and eat leaves! Worms can’t live in just water by itself!
BC is undeterred and excited now as she approaches the desk with both bottles. She shows me the cloudy water bottle with five or maybe six worm parts floating on top.
Now I’ve lost control of what I was supposed to teach about math. Several kids come up for a viewing of worm carcasses in a bottle as BC proudly displays the cloudy bottle for each to see.
Now, it’s not my nature to be real intimidating to little kids. I would not allow a kid to interrupt the lesson like this if it was a 6th, 5th or even a 4th grade classroom. But at this point if the kids seem interested in “science” and even if they have to re-do skip counting as an introduction to multiplication tomorrow; I’m going to let them “off the leash” for a bit.
One of the boys is looking intently into the cloudy bottle and gets excited. “One of those worms is moving!” he announces to the rest. Now we have several little hands and heads trying to gain a look at the miracle of worm resurrection!
BC is confused and surprised as several other kids confirm the sighting of an un-drowned worm in the bottle. She looks intently into the bottle several seconds attempting to confirm the presence of the un-dead worm.
What happened next was surprising but not totally unexpected.
I don’t know if BC actually SAW the worm move or not but it’s a moot point as she snatched the bottle back and began violently shaking the bottle for several seconds.
BC: Ok, NOW they’re all dead!
Now, as I understand the process, science fair projects involve stating a theory, designing an experiment to test the hypothesis and doing the experiment to measure the results to prove or disprove the theory.
BC might not have a future as a “real” scientist but there might be something for her in climate scientology…
Now THIS would have been an interesting project to do for the science fair…
Is that "REAL iron" in iron fortified foods?
Now, it’s not the bottle itself or the kid sneaking an occasional drink during class that bothers me. It is kids playing with and making “crackling” noises during class that will get my unwelcome attention.
If I stop the lesson and laser sight the “bottle cracker”, he/she will eventually notice and will slowly remove it from the desktop, stashing it of sight.
If they are really into the bottle music thing and absolutely clueless to their surroundings, it takes the other kids at the table to prod the kid’s attention back to the front of the room where he/she discovers that I’m intently staring directly at them.
The bottle disappears.
So it was in a 2nd grade classroom yesterday that a tiny girl bottle cracker (aka: BC) got my attention. After asking that the bottle be put away, “BC” blurts: “But it’s my science fair spearmint!!”
I looked a bit more closely and saw that one bottle was 1/3 filled with dirt and some leaf bits on top. The other looked like it had about the same amount of cloudy water.
Me: That’s nice but let’s not play with the bottles during class, ok?
BC: It’s about worms!
Me: We’re supposed to be doing math right now. Maybe we’ll have time for science fair later.
BC: See! Worms live in wet dirt and eat leaves! Worms can’t live in just water by itself!
BC is undeterred and excited now as she approaches the desk with both bottles. She shows me the cloudy water bottle with five or maybe six worm parts floating on top.
Now I’ve lost control of what I was supposed to teach about math. Several kids come up for a viewing of worm carcasses in a bottle as BC proudly displays the cloudy bottle for each to see.
Now, it’s not my nature to be real intimidating to little kids. I would not allow a kid to interrupt the lesson like this if it was a 6th, 5th or even a 4th grade classroom. But at this point if the kids seem interested in “science” and even if they have to re-do skip counting as an introduction to multiplication tomorrow; I’m going to let them “off the leash” for a bit.
One of the boys is looking intently into the cloudy bottle and gets excited. “One of those worms is moving!” he announces to the rest. Now we have several little hands and heads trying to gain a look at the miracle of worm resurrection!
BC is confused and surprised as several other kids confirm the sighting of an un-drowned worm in the bottle. She looks intently into the bottle several seconds attempting to confirm the presence of the un-dead worm.
What happened next was surprising but not totally unexpected.
I don’t know if BC actually SAW the worm move or not but it’s a moot point as she snatched the bottle back and began violently shaking the bottle for several seconds.
BC: Ok, NOW they’re all dead!
Now, as I understand the process, science fair projects involve stating a theory, designing an experiment to test the hypothesis and doing the experiment to measure the results to prove or disprove the theory.
BC might not have a future as a “real” scientist but there might be something for her in climate scientology…
Now THIS would have been an interesting project to do for the science fair…
Is that "REAL iron" in iron fortified foods?
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
The Death of Cursive…
The first assignment after the winter break was a rainy half day in a 5th grade class. The lesson plan had a typical work load including a practice spelling test.
Plan instruction: “After the test, have them self correct with handout and practice writing each word 5x.”
Easy peasy lemon squeezy…until the end of the test when I handed out the spelling work sheet (see below) for self correction purposes.
The first hands started to appear: “Do we have to write the words five times in cursive?”
Since this is a spelling test and the emphasis should be correct spelling over the method; I allowed those who wanted, to “print” instead of “writing” the words to do so.
That satisfied most but not all; “But, I can’t read cursive!” was the next complaint.
Sure enough, there was a note on the lesson plan that stated I might have to “print” the spelling words on the whiteboard for those who can’t read cursive. Amazingly, I was not surprised that today’s 5th graders can’t write cursive longhand. I was surprised that I expected them to be able to read it! Why would I expect them to read longhand when they don’t write?
Personally, my penmanship is so bad it’s illegible. Other than my signature, I almost never write cursive because I never had to use it. The introduction of the typewriter and subsequently the computer keyboard had pretty much made “fancy writing” obsolete by the time I left school. Fortunately for me, a 30 year career in software development never once required writing documentation longhand.
While there are some who might be nostalgic about loss of beautiful penmanship, I can’t see the point other than as artistic exercise. Try Googling “death of cursive” and you can see the handwriting on the wall, so to speak.
(I was going to post this using a cursive font, but the Blogger editor doesn't provide one!)
Plan instruction: “After the test, have them self correct with handout and practice writing each word 5x.”
Easy peasy lemon squeezy…until the end of the test when I handed out the spelling work sheet (see below) for self correction purposes.
The first hands started to appear: “Do we have to write the words five times in cursive?”
Since this is a spelling test and the emphasis should be correct spelling over the method; I allowed those who wanted, to “print” instead of “writing” the words to do so.
That satisfied most but not all; “But, I can’t read cursive!” was the next complaint.
Sure enough, there was a note on the lesson plan that stated I might have to “print” the spelling words on the whiteboard for those who can’t read cursive. Amazingly, I was not surprised that today’s 5th graders can’t write cursive longhand. I was surprised that I expected them to be able to read it! Why would I expect them to read longhand when they don’t write?
Personally, my penmanship is so bad it’s illegible. Other than my signature, I almost never write cursive because I never had to use it. The introduction of the typewriter and subsequently the computer keyboard had pretty much made “fancy writing” obsolete by the time I left school. Fortunately for me, a 30 year career in software development never once required writing documentation longhand.
While there are some who might be nostalgic about loss of beautiful penmanship, I can’t see the point other than as artistic exercise. Try Googling “death of cursive” and you can see the handwriting on the wall, so to speak.
(I was going to post this using a cursive font, but the Blogger editor doesn't provide one!)
Monday, February 22, 2010
Friday, February 19, 2010
Art, History, Drama and Bit of Sand...
Ukrainian artist uses a giant light box, dramatic music, imagination and "sand painting" skills to interpret Germany's invasion and occupation of Ukraine during WWII
Monday, February 15, 2010
Origami Arsenal...
The last week leading into this winter break week was pretty busy. The four assignments in five days went pretty quickly. Only two incidents of note are worth mentioning.
The first was having a “ninja throwing star” sail by my ear as I opened the door to the classroom in the morning. No, it wasn’t a REAL throwing star but one made of folded paper.
The 4th grader ninja kid was more surprised than I was at how close it came to giving me a potential severe paper cut.
I could have sent him off to the office, but instead I made him hand over his entire origami arsenal for the trash can and wrote a note to his teacher for future discipline disposition. I didn’t send him to the office because this school has a weak disciplinarian principal and I knew nothing of consequence would come of it.
“Boys will be boys!”
The second incident occurred at the same school the Friday before the break. I had about 20 more minutes to go over the lesson plan for this final day when there was a knock on the door. The dad, standing there with his son, clearly wasn’t expecting me as I opened the door.
Dad: Uhhh, is Mr. K here?
Me: No, I’m substituting for him today. Can I help you?
The dad and son had just come from meeting with the principle about an incident that had happened previously in the week. His kid was allegedly punched by another kid with a sharp pencil sticking out between the knuckles of his fist. He wanted me to make sure this other kid would not bother his kid today.
That was the shortened story of the conversation. The actual conversation lasted for most of my remaining prep time and included threats of suing the school, the other kid’s parents, the principal, and having the aggressor kid expelled from school etc, etc, etc…
I told him that I completely understood his concerns and promised to watch out for the kid today. I would also leave a note for Mr. K to inform him about his concerns for the safety of his kid when school resumes after winter break. That’s pretty much all I can do as the daily replacement for his teacher.
As the pair turned to leave, I saw the principal making his way out to my classroom.
He saw the pair leave. He told me that “aggressor boy” does have a reputation in the school but for the other kid not to have reported the problem on the day it occurred made him doubt which boy to believe. He asked what thoughts I had about having “aggressor boy” in class today.
I’m thinking: “You want ME to make that decision for you? Ok, then…”
The last day of school before a week off doesn’t have much going on in the classroom so I suggested that he should keep “aggressor boy” in his office for the day, and I would send down his daily work to do.
I don’t need any more complications today.
The first was having a “ninja throwing star” sail by my ear as I opened the door to the classroom in the morning. No, it wasn’t a REAL throwing star but one made of folded paper.
The 4th grader ninja kid was more surprised than I was at how close it came to giving me a potential severe paper cut.
I could have sent him off to the office, but instead I made him hand over his entire origami arsenal for the trash can and wrote a note to his teacher for future discipline disposition. I didn’t send him to the office because this school has a weak disciplinarian principal and I knew nothing of consequence would come of it.
“Boys will be boys!”
The second incident occurred at the same school the Friday before the break. I had about 20 more minutes to go over the lesson plan for this final day when there was a knock on the door. The dad, standing there with his son, clearly wasn’t expecting me as I opened the door.
Dad: Uhhh, is Mr. K here?
Me: No, I’m substituting for him today. Can I help you?
The dad and son had just come from meeting with the principle about an incident that had happened previously in the week. His kid was allegedly punched by another kid with a sharp pencil sticking out between the knuckles of his fist. He wanted me to make sure this other kid would not bother his kid today.
That was the shortened story of the conversation. The actual conversation lasted for most of my remaining prep time and included threats of suing the school, the other kid’s parents, the principal, and having the aggressor kid expelled from school etc, etc, etc…
I told him that I completely understood his concerns and promised to watch out for the kid today. I would also leave a note for Mr. K to inform him about his concerns for the safety of his kid when school resumes after winter break. That’s pretty much all I can do as the daily replacement for his teacher.
As the pair turned to leave, I saw the principal making his way out to my classroom.
He saw the pair leave. He told me that “aggressor boy” does have a reputation in the school but for the other kid not to have reported the problem on the day it occurred made him doubt which boy to believe. He asked what thoughts I had about having “aggressor boy” in class today.
I’m thinking: “You want ME to make that decision for you? Ok, then…”
The last day of school before a week off doesn’t have much going on in the classroom so I suggested that he should keep “aggressor boy” in his office for the day, and I would send down his daily work to do.
I don’t need any more complications today.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Modern Geography Lesson
Do you know where the Faroe Islands are?
Me neither, until I saw it listed on the blog FlagCounter tracker (see the link in the left hand column of the blog) .
Located somewhere between Iceland and Norway, FlagCounter.com lists:
"...The population of the Faroe Islands is largely descended from Viking settlers who arrived in the 9th century. The islands have been connected politically to Denmark since the 14th century. A high degree of self government was granted the Faroese in 1948, who have autonomy over most internal affairs, while Denmark is responsible for justice, defense, and foreign affairs. The Faroe Islands are not part of the European Union."
Geography is much more interesting this way.
Me neither, until I saw it listed on the blog FlagCounter tracker (see the link in the left hand column of the blog) .
Located somewhere between Iceland and Norway, FlagCounter.com lists:
"...The population of the Faroe Islands is largely descended from Viking settlers who arrived in the 9th century. The islands have been connected politically to Denmark since the 14th century. A high degree of self government was granted the Faroese in 1948, who have autonomy over most internal affairs, while Denmark is responsible for justice, defense, and foreign affairs. The Faroe Islands are not part of the European Union."
Geography is much more interesting this way.
Friday, February 05, 2010
Tuesday, February 02, 2010
Young Adults…
I intended to take the day off yesterday. After six straight classes of 5th grade children, I needed a break.
Anticipating a very long weekend until my next scheduled assignment on Wednesday, I declined calls on Friday, Saturday and Sunday to take classes for Monday and Tuesday mornings. After all, being around children constantly can drive a person a bit batty. Just ask any mother of 2 or more school age kids.
Then Sunday night I got a request to sub Monday at one of the three schools in the district I hate to turn down. I hesitate to turn them down because they don’t call that often. More importantly, the quality of student, in general, tends to be more…well…how should I politely say this?...”mature” is an apt description.
There you have it; I passed on several offers to substitute children in favor of one class of young adults the same age.
Now, if only some of the adults I have to interact with wouldn’t act like children most of the time, life would be good!!
Anticipating a very long weekend until my next scheduled assignment on Wednesday, I declined calls on Friday, Saturday and Sunday to take classes for Monday and Tuesday mornings. After all, being around children constantly can drive a person a bit batty. Just ask any mother of 2 or more school age kids.
Then Sunday night I got a request to sub Monday at one of the three schools in the district I hate to turn down. I hesitate to turn them down because they don’t call that often. More importantly, the quality of student, in general, tends to be more…well…how should I politely say this?...”mature” is an apt description.
There you have it; I passed on several offers to substitute children in favor of one class of young adults the same age.
Now, if only some of the adults I have to interact with wouldn’t act like children most of the time, life would be good!!
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
It's Only January...
Subbing 5th graders on Tuesday, I pretty much listed all the boys in the class as disruptive. Each trying to out “goof-ball” each other to see who would win the #1 slacker award for the day.
By contrast, today’s 5th grade class (different school) had only one goof-ball. Not a boy but a cute, petite girl with a huge bubbly personality but zero work ethic and no sense of “personal space”.
Constantly out of her seat and wandering the room visiting friends whenever my back was turned. The final straw was when I caught her sneaking around with scissors in hand trying to snip off part of another girls pony tail.
“You’re gonna write my name down aren’t you...”, she said as I confiscated the scissors before any serious damage occurred. “You got it, kid”, writing her up and checking the clock to see how much more time until the final bell.
Maybe tomorrow will be better at yet another school, but with different 5th graders.
By contrast, today’s 5th grade class (different school) had only one goof-ball. Not a boy but a cute, petite girl with a huge bubbly personality but zero work ethic and no sense of “personal space”.
Constantly out of her seat and wandering the room visiting friends whenever my back was turned. The final straw was when I caught her sneaking around with scissors in hand trying to snip off part of another girls pony tail.
“You’re gonna write my name down aren’t you...”, she said as I confiscated the scissors before any serious damage occurred. “You got it, kid”, writing her up and checking the clock to see how much more time until the final bell.
Maybe tomorrow will be better at yet another school, but with different 5th graders.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Taking Advantage…
Subs are not paid an hourly rate. Instead, we are paid a flat “full day” or “half day” rate. Anything less than four hours is paid at ½ the full daily rate.
A normal working school day is something like 6½ to 7 hours. My full day starts ½ hour before the kids hit the door and “officially” ends at the final bell.
Unofficially my day continues “until all necessary work is completed”. This could mean extending for bus or parking lot duty after school until all the kids are gone.
Every Thursday, in the district I work for, is “minimum day”. The school day is about 1hr shorter than the normal school day. The school day ends pretty much at the end of the lunch period. Subbing on minimum days is a bonus in that we are paid the full day rate for about 5hrs work. For obvious reasons, teachers are reluctant use a discretionary “sub day” on Thursdays.
So when sub line called on Monday for one of those rare “minimum day Thursdays”, I was ready to book it.
That was until I heard that the indicated start time was 1 hour after the normal start of school. The teacher’s appended recorded message told the story:
“I will be in the classroom for the first hour. Since this is a minimum day, this will be only a half day assignment. If you could come in a few minutes early, I need you to run some copies that you will need for the class. You also have recess and after school bus duty. Thanks for covering!”
Her translation:
“I can get most of the day off by working only 1hr in the morning and save myself a ½ a discretionary sub day for later”
My translation:
“I get screwed out of full day’s pay by an hour AND she wants me to come in early!”
I passed on the assignment just on principal.
There might be some newly minted sub that is just waiting for that first call and would gladly snap it up. I hope not.
I was bit bemused to get the automated call for this same assignment the next day. It seems the no one in the substitute pool took the bait on the first pass and it was cycling around again for a second try.
As I turned it down for the 2nd time, I wondered how it would all turn out. Would she give in and re-list it as a proper “full sub day” or would she give up, go to work and save it for another time?
No one likes to be taken advantage of.
A normal working school day is something like 6½ to 7 hours. My full day starts ½ hour before the kids hit the door and “officially” ends at the final bell.
Unofficially my day continues “until all necessary work is completed”. This could mean extending for bus or parking lot duty after school until all the kids are gone.
Every Thursday, in the district I work for, is “minimum day”. The school day is about 1hr shorter than the normal school day. The school day ends pretty much at the end of the lunch period. Subbing on minimum days is a bonus in that we are paid the full day rate for about 5hrs work. For obvious reasons, teachers are reluctant use a discretionary “sub day” on Thursdays.
So when sub line called on Monday for one of those rare “minimum day Thursdays”, I was ready to book it.
That was until I heard that the indicated start time was 1 hour after the normal start of school. The teacher’s appended recorded message told the story:
“I will be in the classroom for the first hour. Since this is a minimum day, this will be only a half day assignment. If you could come in a few minutes early, I need you to run some copies that you will need for the class. You also have recess and after school bus duty. Thanks for covering!”
Her translation:
“I can get most of the day off by working only 1hr in the morning and save myself a ½ a discretionary sub day for later”
My translation:
“I get screwed out of full day’s pay by an hour AND she wants me to come in early!”
I passed on the assignment just on principal.
There might be some newly minted sub that is just waiting for that first call and would gladly snap it up. I hope not.
I was bit bemused to get the automated call for this same assignment the next day. It seems the no one in the substitute pool took the bait on the first pass and it was cycling around again for a second try.
As I turned it down for the 2nd time, I wondered how it would all turn out. Would she give in and re-list it as a proper “full sub day” or would she give up, go to work and save it for another time?
No one likes to be taken advantage of.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Are You Weirder Than a 5th Grader?
I sometimes get weird questions and comments from students in the classes I sub.
Usual questions and comments:
Weird questions and comments:
That last comment was made by a 5th grader while in the company of her regular teacher, no less. A baleful look from me and a “WHAT DID YOU SAY?” from her teacher ended that discussion.
What’s the weirdest question or comment you’ve ever heard from a 10yr old non-family member?
Usual questions and comments:
- How old are you?
- You’re funny!
- Are you married?
- Do you have kids?
- Is your wife a sub too?
Weird questions and comments:
- Can I touch your head?
That last comment was made by a 5th grader while in the company of her regular teacher, no less. A baleful look from me and a “WHAT DID YOU SAY?” from her teacher ended that discussion.
What’s the weirdest question or comment you’ve ever heard from a 10yr old non-family member?
Monday, January 18, 2010
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Wired For Sound…
From part of the email I received from the teacher for this 5th grade class last week:
“…I am planning to head in early to work tomorrow morning for lesson plans for you. I just wanted to give you a little back ground of some of my kids…
…J has hearing aids but does not like to discuss it in front of the class. I normally wear an ear piece/mic that feeds into her hearing aid, however having strep throat I am not going to have you wear it. She is really good at reading lips. Her hearing loss is mild but do not get mad at her if you think she is not listening. When talking to her, just make sure you have eye contact and you’re not talking to her back.”
When I came in the next morning, I saw the ear piece/mic on the desk. It was a single over the ear, flesh colored, straw mic that you sometimes see worn by actors and singers in stage performances. Connected to a separate, small battery control pack it didn’t look like much. But, what a fantastic use in the classroom for a kid with hearing problems!
I was a bit disappointed that I didn’t get a chance to use it but not disappointed enough to risk getting strep throat. J did just fine in class. I did have to remind myself, at times, to look in her direction when giving instruction and reading. It was the other times that “being wired for sound” might have been a distinct disadvantage.
Just how sensitive is that mic? What is its range? You have to be extra careful in what you say when you think no one can hear you.
I asked a few questions about the sensitivity and range of the technology at lunch in the teachers lounge. One of the aides told me that the teacher was in the classroom during recess one day and was wondering much the same thing. She saw J leaning against a tree on the lawn.
Through a closed classroom door and in a calm voice she said: “J, can you hear me?” and watched as J turned around and waved at her from about 100ft away.
So…when Robert emptied the contents of another kids desk on the floor when I was in the classroom, did I use an inaudible expletive before I unloaded on him or did I just think it? Would I have forgotten to take the mic off before going to the teachers lounge for lunch or used the bathroom?
All good things to think about the next time I’m in this classroom and wired for sound…
“…I am planning to head in early to work tomorrow morning for lesson plans for you. I just wanted to give you a little back ground of some of my kids…
…J has hearing aids but does not like to discuss it in front of the class. I normally wear an ear piece/mic that feeds into her hearing aid, however having strep throat I am not going to have you wear it. She is really good at reading lips. Her hearing loss is mild but do not get mad at her if you think she is not listening. When talking to her, just make sure you have eye contact and you’re not talking to her back.”
When I came in the next morning, I saw the ear piece/mic on the desk. It was a single over the ear, flesh colored, straw mic that you sometimes see worn by actors and singers in stage performances. Connected to a separate, small battery control pack it didn’t look like much. But, what a fantastic use in the classroom for a kid with hearing problems!
I was a bit disappointed that I didn’t get a chance to use it but not disappointed enough to risk getting strep throat. J did just fine in class. I did have to remind myself, at times, to look in her direction when giving instruction and reading. It was the other times that “being wired for sound” might have been a distinct disadvantage.
Just how sensitive is that mic? What is its range? You have to be extra careful in what you say when you think no one can hear you.
I asked a few questions about the sensitivity and range of the technology at lunch in the teachers lounge. One of the aides told me that the teacher was in the classroom during recess one day and was wondering much the same thing. She saw J leaning against a tree on the lawn.
Through a closed classroom door and in a calm voice she said: “J, can you hear me?” and watched as J turned around and waved at her from about 100ft away.
So…when Robert emptied the contents of another kids desk on the floor when I was in the classroom, did I use an inaudible expletive before I unloaded on him or did I just think it? Would I have forgotten to take the mic off before going to the teachers lounge for lunch or used the bathroom?
All good things to think about the next time I’m in this classroom and wired for sound…
Thursday, January 07, 2010
A Shoe for a Pencil…
“I can’t find my pencil! I lost my pencil! My pencil is broken! Someone took it!...etc”
The litany of the mysterious disappearing pencil is endless. I haven’t been in a classroom yet where there wasn’t at least one person standing at my desk begging me so solve his/her shortage of pencils problem.
Some classrooms have a stash of new or used pencils for loan. Some substitutes bring extra pens and pencils to lend for such occasions.
…I don’t.
Even if the teacher has a stash for loan, I don’t hand them out for free.
Kid: Can I borrow a pencil?
Me: Sure, ask one of the other kids to lend you one.
Kid: No one else has any. Can I borrow one of the teachers’ pencils?
Me: Sure, give me one of your shoes.
Kid: What?
Me: That’s the deal, a shoe for a pencil. When I get the pencil back, you get your shoe back.
That’s how I ended up with four, single shoes under my desk today in 4th grade. There would have been more but the others decide to redouble their efforts in locating a writing implement in the dark recesses of their own desk or the kindness of a kid with a surplus of leadware.
Now before you think I’m mean (…or brilliant depending on your viewpoint), let me explain that this idea isn’t original. Some teachers have hoards of new and used pencils that kids can use without limit. Some schools have pencil vending machines where you can buy one for a quarter. Some teachers use pencils as bribes for correct behavior and rewards.
A 6th grade teacher I worked for a couple of years ago explained that she felt the kids were taking advantage of her generosity with the new pencils so she started “lending” them out only in exchange for one of their shoes. She noticed right away a decrease in requests. A side affect is that it also cuts down on unnecessary interruptions during class time.
Obviously, I believe this woman is brilliant!
4th grade bonus joke of the day:
Q: What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
A: Nacho Cheese!
The litany of the mysterious disappearing pencil is endless. I haven’t been in a classroom yet where there wasn’t at least one person standing at my desk begging me so solve his/her shortage of pencils problem.
Some classrooms have a stash of new or used pencils for loan. Some substitutes bring extra pens and pencils to lend for such occasions.
…I don’t.
Even if the teacher has a stash for loan, I don’t hand them out for free.
Kid: Can I borrow a pencil?
Me: Sure, ask one of the other kids to lend you one.
Kid: No one else has any. Can I borrow one of the teachers’ pencils?
Me: Sure, give me one of your shoes.
Kid: What?
Me: That’s the deal, a shoe for a pencil. When I get the pencil back, you get your shoe back.
That’s how I ended up with four, single shoes under my desk today in 4th grade. There would have been more but the others decide to redouble their efforts in locating a writing implement in the dark recesses of their own desk or the kindness of a kid with a surplus of leadware.
Now before you think I’m mean (…or brilliant depending on your viewpoint), let me explain that this idea isn’t original. Some teachers have hoards of new and used pencils that kids can use without limit. Some schools have pencil vending machines where you can buy one for a quarter. Some teachers use pencils as bribes for correct behavior and rewards.
A 6th grade teacher I worked for a couple of years ago explained that she felt the kids were taking advantage of her generosity with the new pencils so she started “lending” them out only in exchange for one of their shoes. She noticed right away a decrease in requests. A side affect is that it also cuts down on unnecessary interruptions during class time.
Obviously, I believe this woman is brilliant!
4th grade bonus joke of the day:
Q: What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
A: Nacho Cheese!
Saturday, January 02, 2010
Happy New 2nd Half School Year!
After three weeks of holiday break, it’s time to get back to school. I got a call today to be in class Tuesday Jan/5.
Back to school joke:
One day a mother tries to wake her son up by saying: “Get up! You’re going to be late for school!” Her son says that he doesn’t want to go to school.
His mother then asks him to give two reasons for him not wanting to go to school.
Son replies: “Number one, it’s too early in the morning and number two, I don’t like school”.
The son then asks his mother for two reasons why he SHOULD go to school.
Mom replies: “Firstly because you are 52 years old and secondly you are the principal of the school.”
Back to school joke:
One day a mother tries to wake her son up by saying: “Get up! You’re going to be late for school!” Her son says that he doesn’t want to go to school.
His mother then asks him to give two reasons for him not wanting to go to school.
Son replies: “Number one, it’s too early in the morning and number two, I don’t like school”.
The son then asks his mother for two reasons why he SHOULD go to school.
Mom replies: “Firstly because you are 52 years old and secondly you are the principal of the school.”
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Nonsensical Nickname Nominations…
Well, school is out until the first week in January. I managed to get four days subbing in for the whole month of December.
In my personal quest to curtail the tattling issue when school resumes, I need your help. Trying to play “Judge Judy” to determine who called who “booger brain” or said a “bad” word first is a losing proposition for all parties concerned. Having the offenders say “sorry” and shake hands just doesn’t do it for me.
Last May I gave two incensed little boys (it seems to be ALWAYS boys for some reason) my own nicknames they could call each other and sent them on their way.
Last update I received from “Ear Wax” was that he was still friends with “Nose Hair”. I haven’t been back to Toe Jam & Arm Pit’s school to see if it had the same success there.
It occurred to me that if this method of “bickering resolution” continues to be successful, I’m going to run out of pre-thought out nicknames to use. I suppose I can mix and match from my current list but I thought I’d solicit some additional candidates from my reading audience.
Remember, these are 6-11yr old boys but in case I have a situation with girls, lets keep it clean and gender neutral. Use the comments section for your “nonsensical nickname nomination” and I’ll append it to the list if I think I can use it.
My List So Far: (red ones are my favorite reader picks so far)
(…totally unacceptable submissions will be deleted. Let’s keep it clean)
In my personal quest to curtail the tattling issue when school resumes, I need your help. Trying to play “Judge Judy” to determine who called who “booger brain” or said a “bad” word first is a losing proposition for all parties concerned. Having the offenders say “sorry” and shake hands just doesn’t do it for me.
Last May I gave two incensed little boys (it seems to be ALWAYS boys for some reason) my own nicknames they could call each other and sent them on their way.
Last update I received from “Ear Wax” was that he was still friends with “Nose Hair”. I haven’t been back to Toe Jam & Arm Pit’s school to see if it had the same success there.
It occurred to me that if this method of “bickering resolution” continues to be successful, I’m going to run out of pre-thought out nicknames to use. I suppose I can mix and match from my current list but I thought I’d solicit some additional candidates from my reading audience.
Remember, these are 6-11yr old boys but in case I have a situation with girls, lets keep it clean and gender neutral. Use the comments section for your “nonsensical nickname nomination” and I’ll append it to the list if I think I can use it.
My List So Far: (red ones are my favorite reader picks so far)
- Nose Hair & Ear Wax
- Toe Jam & Arm Pit
- Chin Strap & Knee Cap (has a nice rhyme to it)
- Elbow and Ear lobe (Thanks Ricochet!)
- Toe Nail & Nose Bone (Thanks Mrs_Dem)
(…totally unacceptable submissions will be deleted. Let’s keep it clean)
Friday, December 18, 2009
Monday, December 14, 2009
Physical Education (PE)
I picked up surprise assignments for Thursday and Friday. It was a surprise because it was for one of the schools I rarely see on the sub system. In six years of subbing, I’ve been to this school exactly twice before.
I’m not sure when PE was instituted for class levels below middle school, but it was sometime after I last attended. In High School we had PE clothes to change into for class. You could get out of PE class if you had a medical excuse or you were a member of one of the sports teams. In all cases, PE meant you were supposed to exert yourself enough to soak your PE clothes with sweat.
From personal observation, PE means “Pathetic Enthusiasm” when it comes to any kind of organized exercises for elementary school kids. Even the obligatory final “take two laps” is taken at a leisurely walk by a good number of the kids.
When I was informed that, because of the rain, the PE class for my 4th graders would be held in the cafeteria/common room with the three other 4th grades I wasn’t expecting anything more than the usual “Pathetic Enthusiasm” of non-exercise.
I was wrong.
A sound system was rolled out and a video on the 12 foot projection screen started. “Tae Bo Kicks for Kids” had over a hundred 4th graders kicking, twisting, and moving to the beat. It was actually fun to watch them.
No, not all were in sync all the time, but at the end I did see more than a few sweat stains.
I’m not sure when PE was instituted for class levels below middle school, but it was sometime after I last attended. In High School we had PE clothes to change into for class. You could get out of PE class if you had a medical excuse or you were a member of one of the sports teams. In all cases, PE meant you were supposed to exert yourself enough to soak your PE clothes with sweat.
From personal observation, PE means “Pathetic Enthusiasm” when it comes to any kind of organized exercises for elementary school kids. Even the obligatory final “take two laps” is taken at a leisurely walk by a good number of the kids.
When I was informed that, because of the rain, the PE class for my 4th graders would be held in the cafeteria/common room with the three other 4th grades I wasn’t expecting anything more than the usual “Pathetic Enthusiasm” of non-exercise.
I was wrong.
A sound system was rolled out and a video on the 12 foot projection screen started. “Tae Bo Kicks for Kids” had over a hundred 4th graders kicking, twisting, and moving to the beat. It was actually fun to watch them.
No, not all were in sync all the time, but at the end I did see more than a few sweat stains.
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Wednesday, December 09, 2009
Must Be Nice…
I subbed two 5th grade classes on Monday & Tuesday this week. The first was a tough day, the second pretty easy.
Those were the only subbing days I’ve worked since the Thanksgiving break. Five days of vacation break followed by an additional seven days of no calls.
“Must be nice”, she said going out the door to work while I’m lounging in my PJ’s.
My wife has one of those regular jobs where they expect you to show up for work on a regular basis. She’s also into a ton of extra curricular, non-paying activities that most times make for some real long days away from the house.
She’s tired and stressed. She’s got too much to do and not enough time to do it all. I understand completely what she’s feeling. She’d like to have more time to herself. She’d like an unscheduled day, week or even a month off. I know I enjoy it!
I don’t have to ask for a day off or “get it approved” by anyone. I don’t need a reason. I don’t have to prepare for someone else to do my job for me in case I have to cancel at the last moment. It’s actually pretty stress free most of the time.
While regular teachers DO get a lot of time off, I get even more. I get the three months of summer plus 3-4 weeks during the school year for the scheduled holiday weeks. I also get any days that I can’t work due to personal commitments and days where I simply “don’t wanna go”. Add to that the days I don’t work because I’m not needed and it sometimes seems like I’m not working at all!
So when she says: “Must be nice”, I know I’m supposed to feel guilty. To assuage that guilt, I simply state that she could have all those same benefits (plus low pay) that I have. All she has to do is quit and start substitute teaching too!
But…she reads this blog and “must be nice” doesn’t much come to mind compared to her current job.
Those were the only subbing days I’ve worked since the Thanksgiving break. Five days of vacation break followed by an additional seven days of no calls.
“Must be nice”, she said going out the door to work while I’m lounging in my PJ’s.
My wife has one of those regular jobs where they expect you to show up for work on a regular basis. She’s also into a ton of extra curricular, non-paying activities that most times make for some real long days away from the house.
She’s tired and stressed. She’s got too much to do and not enough time to do it all. I understand completely what she’s feeling. She’d like to have more time to herself. She’d like an unscheduled day, week or even a month off. I know I enjoy it!
I don’t have to ask for a day off or “get it approved” by anyone. I don’t need a reason. I don’t have to prepare for someone else to do my job for me in case I have to cancel at the last moment. It’s actually pretty stress free most of the time.
While regular teachers DO get a lot of time off, I get even more. I get the three months of summer plus 3-4 weeks during the school year for the scheduled holiday weeks. I also get any days that I can’t work due to personal commitments and days where I simply “don’t wanna go”. Add to that the days I don’t work because I’m not needed and it sometimes seems like I’m not working at all!
So when she says: “Must be nice”, I know I’m supposed to feel guilty. To assuage that guilt, I simply state that she could have all those same benefits (plus low pay) that I have. All she has to do is quit and start substitute teaching too!
But…she reads this blog and “must be nice” doesn’t much come to mind compared to her current job.
Friday, November 27, 2009
Classroom Landmines…
Last week in 6th grade I triggered a “classroom landmine”.
This isn’t the first time I’ve set one off and I don’t really mean to cause explosive situations in the classroom. Teachers are reluctant to inform subs on the lesson plans where the landmines are or just what will set them off. The few times I’ve asked about why I wasn’t informed beforehand, I got the “student confidentially” excuse. As a direct consequence, I’m not ready for the weird reactions I get when I accidentally stumble across the trip wires that cause reactions like Art Guy & Barking Boy.
She was like any other kid in class. Not disruptive in any way. She did use, what seemed to me, an above average vocabulary and word phrasing for a 6th grader. I wasn’t aware that she was, in reality, a classroom landmine. It happened during shared reading time.
I would read a few paragraphs from the novel they were working through and then pick a random Popsicle stick with a name from the cup on the desk to continue the story. If the kid called hadn’t been following the story, it was immediately obvious. We’d all wait until his/her table mates pointed out the right page/paragraph to continue the story. They learn quickly to follow along with the class. This keeps them on their toes to avoid being “not ready” if called.
Her name came up and the “deer caught in the headlights” look told me she hadn’t been reading along and didn’t know where to continue the story. Like several students before her she flustered a bit before her table-mates got her to the correct page and paragraph.
Then it hit.
Instead of starting to read, as others had, she started choking, making gulping noises and frantically pointing at her throat! I’m stunned. I start to panic: "OMG, The kid’s gonna choke and die right here in the classroom!"
The kids see my panicked look and one of the girls at her table informs me: “Oh! She does that when she doesn’t want to read out loud. It happens all the time”. I tell her: “It’s ok, she doesn’t have to read. We’ll just pick someone else.”
As I carefully put her Popsicle stick on the table while picking another Popsicle stick from the cup, “landmine girl” shouts: “No, no, I can read, I can!” Before I can respond she starts reading the next paragraphs so fast that I can’t understand her. I think she finished the chapter we were reading but since I only caught every third or fourth word, I’m sure the rest of the class heard just a blur.
I commended “landmine girl” for reading but I explain that most of the class probably didn’t read as fast so I suggested we re-read the section just to make sure everyone understood the storyline.
As I start to re-read the chapter, “landmine girl” complains bitterly that: “I already that part” and continues with the same complaint as the rest of the class is called one at a time to participate.
I detailed the incident on the end of day status report I leave for the teacher hoping that I handled the situation as best I could and gently suggesting that a little warning would have been helpful.
Classroom tip of the day: Watch your step!!
This isn’t the first time I’ve set one off and I don’t really mean to cause explosive situations in the classroom. Teachers are reluctant to inform subs on the lesson plans where the landmines are or just what will set them off. The few times I’ve asked about why I wasn’t informed beforehand, I got the “student confidentially” excuse. As a direct consequence, I’m not ready for the weird reactions I get when I accidentally stumble across the trip wires that cause reactions like Art Guy & Barking Boy.
She was like any other kid in class. Not disruptive in any way. She did use, what seemed to me, an above average vocabulary and word phrasing for a 6th grader. I wasn’t aware that she was, in reality, a classroom landmine. It happened during shared reading time.
I would read a few paragraphs from the novel they were working through and then pick a random Popsicle stick with a name from the cup on the desk to continue the story. If the kid called hadn’t been following the story, it was immediately obvious. We’d all wait until his/her table mates pointed out the right page/paragraph to continue the story. They learn quickly to follow along with the class. This keeps them on their toes to avoid being “not ready” if called.
Her name came up and the “deer caught in the headlights” look told me she hadn’t been reading along and didn’t know where to continue the story. Like several students before her she flustered a bit before her table-mates got her to the correct page and paragraph.
Then it hit.
Instead of starting to read, as others had, she started choking, making gulping noises and frantically pointing at her throat! I’m stunned. I start to panic: "OMG, The kid’s gonna choke and die right here in the classroom!"
The kids see my panicked look and one of the girls at her table informs me: “Oh! She does that when she doesn’t want to read out loud. It happens all the time”. I tell her: “It’s ok, she doesn’t have to read. We’ll just pick someone else.”
As I carefully put her Popsicle stick on the table while picking another Popsicle stick from the cup, “landmine girl” shouts: “No, no, I can read, I can!” Before I can respond she starts reading the next paragraphs so fast that I can’t understand her. I think she finished the chapter we were reading but since I only caught every third or fourth word, I’m sure the rest of the class heard just a blur.
I commended “landmine girl” for reading but I explain that most of the class probably didn’t read as fast so I suggested we re-read the section just to make sure everyone understood the storyline.
As I start to re-read the chapter, “landmine girl” complains bitterly that: “I already that part” and continues with the same complaint as the rest of the class is called one at a time to participate.
I detailed the incident on the end of day status report I leave for the teacher hoping that I handled the situation as best I could and gently suggesting that a little warning would have been helpful.
Classroom tip of the day: Watch your step!!
Friday, November 20, 2009
In a Rut...
I’ve gotten myself in a rut.
Teachers prefer bypassing any automated “random sub” assignment system in favor of a short list of substitutes they personally know. This is why new substitutes don’t get much work at first.
There are thirteen schools in the school district I work, but the last couple of years I seem to be getting 95% of all my assignments from only two schools. After five years on the job, I’m one of the first substitutes they call when they need a substitute and as a result I’m rarely available to work any other school.
That’s good and bad.
The good is that the kids all know me in those two schools and I “know” most of them even if I can’t remember specific names. The bad is that I’m probably missing out on other assignments when these two schools experience lulls in subbing assignments.
One way to “break out” of such a rut is to accept half-day assignments at schools I rarely hear from.
Most subs don’t like taking “half days” because it’s only “half pay”. It seems hardly worth the effort when the possibility for a full day and full pay assignment might have been the next call.
Last week I took a “half day” from a 1st year 6th grade teacher I didn’t know at a school I rarely hear from.
I was even able to double end this assignment with a 2nd “half day” with one of my regular schools because the teachers at both schools arranged it. It seems they had to observe each other in the classroom as part of some teacher evaluation assignment.
This week the 1st year teacher called on Monday to ask if I would take her class on Thursday. She said her class had a very positive response to my short time with them and she didn’t know any reliable subs to call.
If this works out right, I might have increased my “regular schools” pool by 50%.
Teachers prefer bypassing any automated “random sub” assignment system in favor of a short list of substitutes they personally know. This is why new substitutes don’t get much work at first.
There are thirteen schools in the school district I work, but the last couple of years I seem to be getting 95% of all my assignments from only two schools. After five years on the job, I’m one of the first substitutes they call when they need a substitute and as a result I’m rarely available to work any other school.
That’s good and bad.
The good is that the kids all know me in those two schools and I “know” most of them even if I can’t remember specific names. The bad is that I’m probably missing out on other assignments when these two schools experience lulls in subbing assignments.
One way to “break out” of such a rut is to accept half-day assignments at schools I rarely hear from.
Most subs don’t like taking “half days” because it’s only “half pay”. It seems hardly worth the effort when the possibility for a full day and full pay assignment might have been the next call.
Last week I took a “half day” from a 1st year 6th grade teacher I didn’t know at a school I rarely hear from.
I was even able to double end this assignment with a 2nd “half day” with one of my regular schools because the teachers at both schools arranged it. It seems they had to observe each other in the classroom as part of some teacher evaluation assignment.
This week the 1st year teacher called on Monday to ask if I would take her class on Thursday. She said her class had a very positive response to my short time with them and she didn’t know any reliable subs to call.
If this works out right, I might have increased my “regular schools” pool by 50%.
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Operation Christmas Child 2009
Another worthy public service project...
Our church, several others and the local high school have participated in this project each year for the last few years now. Claudette had fun taking the grand-girls out shopping for little toys to fill four shoe boxes. We'll be down at the church this Saturday morning wrapping and packing several hundred boxes to send out.
I'm sure there is a church or organization in your area if you wish to help with a shoebox donation of your own.
Thank You!
Our church, several others and the local high school have participated in this project each year for the last few years now. Claudette had fun taking the grand-girls out shopping for little toys to fill four shoe boxes. We'll be down at the church this Saturday morning wrapping and packing several hundred boxes to send out.
I'm sure there is a church or organization in your area if you wish to help with a shoebox donation of your own.
Thank You!
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Donors Choose...
A public service announcement:
I've heard more than a few good stories about "Donors Choose" so...
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For the month of November, if you post a "thank a teacher" video to MyTeacherMyHero.com, you will get $25 to give toward any special project or classroom supply request posted to DonorsChoose.org.
Also, you can give a shout out to your favorite teacher on twitter -- just post #MyTeacherMyHero Teacher Name, Subject, School, City, State.
The teacher as well as the school that tallies the most mentions on #MyTeacherMyHero during American Education Week (that's this week) will each be awarded a special donation of $1,000 toward the supplies or project of their choice.
Whether it's books or beakers, for second graders or sophomores, in Honolulu or Hartford there are thousands of classroom needs represented. Since launching in 2000, DonorsChoose.org has channeled over $40 million to 2.6 million students in classrooms nationwide.
A social video website, My Teacher, My Hero came together to honor those teachers who have touched lives -- with the hope that their stories will inspire others to pursue the teaching profession (if we cannot change the pay scale, then we can at least acknowledge teachers' important role in our society).
Details can be found online at http://myteachermyhero.com/blog/
I've heard more than a few good stories about "Donors Choose" so...
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
For the month of November, if you post a "thank a teacher" video to MyTeacherMyHero.com, you will get $25 to give toward any special project or classroom supply request posted to DonorsChoose.org.
Also, you can give a shout out to your favorite teacher on twitter -- just post #MyTeacherMyHero Teacher Name, Subject, School, City, State.
The teacher as well as the school that tallies the most mentions on #MyTeacherMyHero during American Education Week (that's this week) will each be awarded a special donation of $1,000 toward the supplies or project of their choice.
Whether it's books or beakers, for second graders or sophomores, in Honolulu or Hartford there are thousands of classroom needs represented. Since launching in 2000, DonorsChoose.org has channeled over $40 million to 2.6 million students in classrooms nationwide.
A social video website, My Teacher, My Hero came together to honor those teachers who have touched lives -- with the hope that their stories will inspire others to pursue the teaching profession (if we cannot change the pay scale, then we can at least acknowledge teachers' important role in our society).
Details can be found online at http://myteachermyhero.com/blog/
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Odds & Ends
I was informed by one of my loyal readers that it’s been more than two weeks since I’ve written anything related to actual school stuff. I was told that posting videos and math problems don’t count.
So, Gary…from the “Odd things I noticed while at school” diary these last couple of weeks:
3rd grade: Be sure to remove the headphones plug from the cassette player to make the speakers play. I should have tested the player before school instead of the instant I needed it at the start of the reading lesson.
4th grade: Assigned nicknames for a different pair of tattlers – “Toe Jam” and “Arm Pit”
4th&6th grades: Subbed two classes at two different schools in a single day. The 6th graders were better behaved.
The teachers were required to observe each other in their respective classrooms for some kind of teacher evaluation process. I got paid for a single full day instead of two half days which would have paid more.
5th grade: First time I’ve ever seen two sign in sheets for substitute teachers in the office. Twenty out of twenty-seven teachers out in a single day!
1st grade: Dealing with the little Khan man again. I see a little improvement. At least he isn’t pretending not to know English any more.
So, Gary…from the “Odd things I noticed while at school” diary these last couple of weeks:
3rd grade: Be sure to remove the headphones plug from the cassette player to make the speakers play. I should have tested the player before school instead of the instant I needed it at the start of the reading lesson.
4th grade: Assigned nicknames for a different pair of tattlers – “Toe Jam” and “Arm Pit”
4th&6th grades: Subbed two classes at two different schools in a single day. The 6th graders were better behaved.
The teachers were required to observe each other in their respective classrooms for some kind of teacher evaluation process. I got paid for a single full day instead of two half days which would have paid more.
5th grade: First time I’ve ever seen two sign in sheets for substitute teachers in the office. Twenty out of twenty-seven teachers out in a single day!
1st grade: Dealing with the little Khan man again. I see a little improvement. At least he isn’t pretending not to know English any more.
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Jack Webb on Healthcare
I wonder how many followers of this blog are old enough to know the "Jack Webb" reference?
Monday, November 09, 2009
Brain Twister
(From the same 5th grade test...)
This is the other question I missed on the test. Actually, I gave up because we ran out of time. You have 10 minutes. GO!!
(Click pink to enlarge...)
This is the other question I missed on the test. Actually, I gave up because we ran out of time. You have 10 minutes. GO!!
(Click pink to enlarge...)
Saturday, November 07, 2009
How Many Squares?
What does a substitute teacher do during 5th grade math tests? Sometimes he takes it himself. It's embarrassing if he can get only four of six problems correct.
This WAS a tough little practice test. Six questions and 30minutes to complete. The best student score was 4 correct...same as mine. Take the test to see how you do. Then "comment" with your answer. No cheating please!
How many squares do you see?
(I missed one !!**%$&^% square! ...had to look on the answer sheet to find it)
This WAS a tough little practice test. Six questions and 30minutes to complete. The best student score was 4 correct...same as mine. Take the test to see how you do. Then "comment" with your answer. No cheating please!
How many squares do you see?
(I missed one !!**%$&^% square! ...had to look on the answer sheet to find it)
Friday, November 06, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Inclement Day Session...
I’ve heard rumors about some areas of the country where they cancel school due to heavy snow and impassable roads. I say rumors because I’ve never experienced one. Here, in Silicone Valley California, we rarely get snow. The couple of times in the last 40 years when it actually did snow on the valley floor, it was gone in a few hours. We do have the occasional “rainy day” session where recess and or lunch is held in the classroom but in reality, the weather here rarely interferes with school activities.
That’s why I was surprised yesterday by the office noon time announcement that due to the “cold windy conditions”, teachers should decide if they want to allow the kids to eat lunch in the classroom as there wasn’t room in the cafeteria to eat indoors. Half the cafeteria had been taken over by the Halloween Haunted House they were running this week. I stepped outside to see what “cold windy conditions” the principal was talking about.
The classroom is situated near a small curved stadium like seating area outside the classroom door. It’s in bright sunshine and must have been in the mid 60’s with just a bit of a breeze reaching the bottom steps of the protected seating area.
Eat inside because of rain, falling snow, raging floods, freezing temperatures or even typhoon force winds, I might relent. But, a little bit of Calif breeze? No way!
“But it’s so COLD!!” says the kid standing in front of me dressed in T-shirt, shorts and shoes without socks as I’m locking the classroom door.
“Remember this moment when you get dressed for school tomorrow morning”, was my reply as I lead them off to get lunch.
Coming back to the classroom after lunch, I see that the door to the classroom is wide open and no one around. Evidentially, someone had talked the janitor into unlocking classroom door to allow some kids to eat inside. I don’t know if there was any adult supervision while I was away, but no one closed the door after they left.
Fortunately, the teacher’s laptop computer, portable document camera and, more importantly, my personal subbing bag looked to be unmolested.
I see that it isn’t just kids who seem to be lacking some common sense.
That’s why I was surprised yesterday by the office noon time announcement that due to the “cold windy conditions”, teachers should decide if they want to allow the kids to eat lunch in the classroom as there wasn’t room in the cafeteria to eat indoors. Half the cafeteria had been taken over by the Halloween Haunted House they were running this week. I stepped outside to see what “cold windy conditions” the principal was talking about.
The classroom is situated near a small curved stadium like seating area outside the classroom door. It’s in bright sunshine and must have been in the mid 60’s with just a bit of a breeze reaching the bottom steps of the protected seating area.
Eat inside because of rain, falling snow, raging floods, freezing temperatures or even typhoon force winds, I might relent. But, a little bit of Calif breeze? No way!
“But it’s so COLD!!” says the kid standing in front of me dressed in T-shirt, shorts and shoes without socks as I’m locking the classroom door.
“Remember this moment when you get dressed for school tomorrow morning”, was my reply as I lead them off to get lunch.
Coming back to the classroom after lunch, I see that the door to the classroom is wide open and no one around. Evidentially, someone had talked the janitor into unlocking classroom door to allow some kids to eat inside. I don’t know if there was any adult supervision while I was away, but no one closed the door after they left.
Fortunately, the teacher’s laptop computer, portable document camera and, more importantly, my personal subbing bag looked to be unmolested.
I see that it isn’t just kids who seem to be lacking some common sense.
Monday, October 26, 2009
Old School in the Hi-Tech Classroom…
I’m in the same classroom, for the same teacher, in the same HI_TECH classroom where I had a brain-fart, screw-up with the SmartBoard.
Everything that went so smoothly last time, didn’t work so well this time.
He was in the classroom when I arrived doing last minute preparation to configure the applications and lesson plan on the computer. After he left to make his jury appointment, I discovered:
Everything that went so smoothly last time, didn’t work so well this time.
He was in the classroom when I arrived doing last minute preparation to configure the applications and lesson plan on the computer. After he left to make his jury appointment, I discovered:
- The lesson plan on the hard drive was the old plan I used last week. Fortunately he printed a hard copy for today’s class.
- The application files on the hard disk were the ones for last week’s lesson also and useless for today.
- The flash drive with the backup lesson plan and application files disappeared. I think he had it in his pocket when he left.
- Yard duty and library time were not indicated on the lesson plan. I missed both until it was too late to do anything about.
- For some reason the audio on the Apple Notebook computer was not functional so that meant the planned instructional video was useless unless all the kids could read lips.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Walk Don’t Walk…
At the elementary school, yard duty is actually pretty boring duty. Be the adult presence in the yard. Walk around and keep the peace. Attempt to have the eyes in the back of your head to see that errant basketball before it hits you in the back.
“Walk! Don’t run!” is the order of the day even though it seems counter productive to not to encourage a healthy activity like running just for the fun of it.
Someone might fall and hurt themselves is the explanation. But we’re sending mixed signals, commanding kids to “RUN! Don’t walk!” laps during P.E. class. These are the same kids who would willingly chase after each other at tilt-a-whirl speed for the entire 20min recess if we let them.
The playgrounds we had when we went to school were all concrete or asphalt. Yea, there were some skinned knees and sore elbows, but it was part of the risk of having fun. You quickly learned the limits of your gymnastic ability.
Now the school playgrounds, where all the climbing bars, swings and slides are located, have a spongy rubber matted surface underlay to cushion any fall. Does this reduce the risk of injury? My informal observations seem to indicate that kids tend to jump off swings and climbing bars from much higher heights than I ever remember doing.
I guess I’m supposed to discourage jumping off things any higher than a foot or so but they don’t seem to be injuring themselves, so I let it slide. They’re having fun.
(…Why is that teacher with the horrified look running over here? Should blow my whistle and yell at her to “WALK, DON’T RUN?”)
“Walk! Don’t run!” is the order of the day even though it seems counter productive to not to encourage a healthy activity like running just for the fun of it.
Someone might fall and hurt themselves is the explanation. But we’re sending mixed signals, commanding kids to “RUN! Don’t walk!” laps during P.E. class. These are the same kids who would willingly chase after each other at tilt-a-whirl speed for the entire 20min recess if we let them.
The playgrounds we had when we went to school were all concrete or asphalt. Yea, there were some skinned knees and sore elbows, but it was part of the risk of having fun. You quickly learned the limits of your gymnastic ability.
Now the school playgrounds, where all the climbing bars, swings and slides are located, have a spongy rubber matted surface underlay to cushion any fall. Does this reduce the risk of injury? My informal observations seem to indicate that kids tend to jump off swings and climbing bars from much higher heights than I ever remember doing.
I guess I’m supposed to discourage jumping off things any higher than a foot or so but they don’t seem to be injuring themselves, so I let it slide. They’re having fun.
(…Why is that teacher with the horrified look running over here? Should blow my whistle and yell at her to “WALK, DON’T RUN?”)
Friday, October 16, 2009
Looking For Nose Hair…
I was on recess yard duty today when a kid walks up: “Hi! Do you remember me?”
Honestly, the only kids’ names I remember are the ones that are memorable for all the wrong reasons. This kid didn’t jog any of the incidents I usually write about so I asked for a hint.
EW: I’m Ear Wax! Remember? You gave me and (another name/face I don’t remember) the nicknames Nose Hair and Ear Wax!! That was REALLY funny!
His new buddy standing next to him is nodding his concurrence about the funniness factor of that day.
Me: Ahhh! Yes, I DO remember that. How are you and Nose Hair doing this year? Are you still friends?
EW: Yea! We still are friends except he’s in a different class this year.
He then ran off, I assume looking for Nose Hair.
Honestly, the only kids’ names I remember are the ones that are memorable for all the wrong reasons. This kid didn’t jog any of the incidents I usually write about so I asked for a hint.
EW: I’m Ear Wax! Remember? You gave me and (another name/face I don’t remember) the nicknames Nose Hair and Ear Wax!! That was REALLY funny!
His new buddy standing next to him is nodding his concurrence about the funniness factor of that day.
Me: Ahhh! Yes, I DO remember that. How are you and Nose Hair doing this year? Are you still friends?
EW: Yea! We still are friends except he’s in a different class this year.
He then ran off, I assume looking for Nose Hair.
Friday, October 09, 2009
SmartBoard Clean-up…
I just finished a week long assignment in a 5th grade classroom that had THE total Uber-SmartBoard setup. This teacher is hot into the new tech classroom equipment.
SmartBoard Keyboard, SmartBoard tablet, SmartBoard stylus, SmartBoard mini-mouse and Doc-Reader.
All lesson plans, books, worksheets, videos, student selector applications, lesson videos; EVERYTHING was on the computer for use on the SmartBoard. The amazing thing was it all worked!
(He also had hard copies of the lesson plans and the teacher’s manuals for backup…just in case.)
This isn't the first time I've encountered SmartBoards. I've used them in several classes over the last couple of years. Every time I encounter one of these SmartBoard setups, there are written precautions in the plans about not treating it like an ordinary whiteboard.
RULE #1
Don’t use Sharpies on the SmartBoard!!
Don’t use pencils on the SmartBoard!!
Don’t use crayon on the SmartBoard!!
Don’t use ballpoint pens on the SmartBoard!!
Don’t use Dry Erase markers on the SmartBoard!!
Don’t use ANYTHING except SmartBoard pens on the SmartBoard or…ELSE!!
RULE #2
(See Rule #1)
So...on that LAST day (today) of the assignment, I was using the whiteboard to write something just to the left of the SmartBoard when one of the kids asked me about a question on the worksheet displayed on the SmartBoard.
You know what comes next…
I turned and wrote the number "2" while starting to explain the problem in question and…I knew it as soon as I did it. I was holding a black DryErase pen.
I didn't need the chorus of "Noooo's" from the classroom to tell me that I had just royally screwed up. I’ve never broken Rule #1 since these things started showing up in classrooms…until now!
While looking for something that might be used to clean the screen, I found a container of germicidal wipes. Luckily almost every school classroom is H1N1 phobic these days and has these things on hand to wipe down desk tops and sinks. It had a familiar odor.
Fortunately from my previous employment in HiTech, I know that Isopropyl Alcohol (IPA) is used to clean electronic equipment without using abrasives or leaving residue. I hoped that it might work on SmartBoard screw-ups without damage.
I tested a wipe on just a small spot on the screen and the marker came right off. I verified that the screen still worked over that area before erasing the rest of my dumb blunder. The board was working fine for the rest of the period.
Now, I might have gotten away without the teacher knowing how bad I screwed up but there was the small matter of those 28 little witnesses seated behind me.
I added my confession to my end of day report.
I may not have a future at this school come Monday morning.
SmartBoard Keyboard, SmartBoard tablet, SmartBoard stylus, SmartBoard mini-mouse and Doc-Reader.
All lesson plans, books, worksheets, videos, student selector applications, lesson videos; EVERYTHING was on the computer for use on the SmartBoard. The amazing thing was it all worked!
(He also had hard copies of the lesson plans and the teacher’s manuals for backup…just in case.)
This isn't the first time I've encountered SmartBoards. I've used them in several classes over the last couple of years. Every time I encounter one of these SmartBoard setups, there are written precautions in the plans about not treating it like an ordinary whiteboard.
RULE #1
Don’t use Sharpies on the SmartBoard!!
Don’t use pencils on the SmartBoard!!
Don’t use crayon on the SmartBoard!!
Don’t use ballpoint pens on the SmartBoard!!
Don’t use Dry Erase markers on the SmartBoard!!
Don’t use ANYTHING except SmartBoard pens on the SmartBoard or…ELSE!!
RULE #2
(See Rule #1)
So...on that LAST day (today) of the assignment, I was using the whiteboard to write something just to the left of the SmartBoard when one of the kids asked me about a question on the worksheet displayed on the SmartBoard.
You know what comes next…
I turned and wrote the number "2" while starting to explain the problem in question and…I knew it as soon as I did it. I was holding a black DryErase pen.
I didn't need the chorus of "Noooo's" from the classroom to tell me that I had just royally screwed up. I’ve never broken Rule #1 since these things started showing up in classrooms…until now!
While looking for something that might be used to clean the screen, I found a container of germicidal wipes. Luckily almost every school classroom is H1N1 phobic these days and has these things on hand to wipe down desk tops and sinks. It had a familiar odor.
Fortunately from my previous employment in HiTech, I know that Isopropyl Alcohol (IPA) is used to clean electronic equipment without using abrasives or leaving residue. I hoped that it might work on SmartBoard screw-ups without damage.
I tested a wipe on just a small spot on the screen and the marker came right off. I verified that the screen still worked over that area before erasing the rest of my dumb blunder. The board was working fine for the rest of the period.
Now, I might have gotten away without the teacher knowing how bad I screwed up but there was the small matter of those 28 little witnesses seated behind me.
I added my confession to my end of day report.
I may not have a future at this school come Monday morning.
Saturday, October 03, 2009
Aloha!
We've been on vacation this last week so that's the reason there haven't been any blog updates.
Even though I had notified the district that I wouldn't be available for a week, I still had four SubFinder call attempts and two teacher calls waiting for me when we returned Friday night.
I don't take a computer on vacation and don't have a cell phone or email access but through a convoluted set of connections, a teacher was still able to contact me to ask that I take his 5th grade class for a week starting Monday.
While talking to the bellman at the resort we were staying at, I discovered that he is a teacher at the local high school and works at this second job on weekends.
When I told him that I was a substitute teacher back home, he said I could probably work every school day on the island of Kauai at $175/day even though the school district has implemented "Furlough Fridays" and cut the school year by 17 days.
I declined the offer...
(Guess which beach this is to win a virtual piña colada...)
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Good Class In a Not So Good Neighborhood…
G5
I sub at this school maybe 3-4 times a year. I believe that the last time I was here, the police had just nabbed a guy that lived in the apartments bordering the school for murdering his girlfriend and dumping the body at the city landfill.
As we were coming up to the first recess, a man entered from a connecting classroom and ran out our door.
“Uhh…Who was THAT?”, I asked the kids. “That’s Jesse the janitor”, they answered with no further explanation.
A bit later there is an announcement that recess will be delayed until further notice and that the teachers are to keep the kids in the classroom until otherwise informed.
It seems that a kid (teenager) from the neighborhood was kicked out of his house and decided to take a nap…on the school field. When asked to leave, he replied: “That ain’t gonna happen” and went back to sleep. That was when the police were called to haul his ass away.
I found this out in the teachers lounge at lunch from the teacher that tried to get the kid to leave without involving the police. He told me that police actions like this happen on campus two or three times a year.
I sub at this school maybe 3-4 times a year. I believe that the last time I was here, the police had just nabbed a guy that lived in the apartments bordering the school for murdering his girlfriend and dumping the body at the city landfill.
As we were coming up to the first recess, a man entered from a connecting classroom and ran out our door.
“Uhh…Who was THAT?”, I asked the kids. “That’s Jesse the janitor”, they answered with no further explanation.
A bit later there is an announcement that recess will be delayed until further notice and that the teachers are to keep the kids in the classroom until otherwise informed.
It seems that a kid (teenager) from the neighborhood was kicked out of his house and decided to take a nap…on the school field. When asked to leave, he replied: “That ain’t gonna happen” and went back to sleep. That was when the police were called to haul his ass away.
I found this out in the teachers lounge at lunch from the teacher that tried to get the kid to leave without involving the police. He told me that police actions like this happen on campus two or three times a year.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Odd Questions and an AARPH…
Just an odd collection of questions and new information I learned in the 1st and 4th grade classes I had last week.
“Aren’t you too old to remember stuff?”
Kind of a rude question but I WAS wondering if I had left the garage door open when I left for school this morning.
“Where’s my pink jacket?”
I’m betting this comes up a lot about other items of clothing that this kid may or may not have worn to school. I thought she was asking to volunteer an answer to the math question I asked the class.
On a 1st grade sentence board: “My dog says “Aarph!”
Maybe in some other weird English speaking country they do but here in America, dogs say “Arf!” Just ask Little Orphan Annie or her dog Sandy.
“Aren’t you too old to remember stuff?”
Kind of a rude question but I WAS wondering if I had left the garage door open when I left for school this morning.
“Where’s my pink jacket?”
I’m betting this comes up a lot about other items of clothing that this kid may or may not have worn to school. I thought she was asking to volunteer an answer to the math question I asked the class.
On a 1st grade sentence board: “My dog says “Aarph!”
Maybe in some other weird English speaking country they do but here in America, dogs say “Arf!” Just ask Little Orphan Annie or her dog Sandy.
Monday, September 21, 2009
Top 20?
The StatCounter has been running a bit higher than normal.
Investigating a bit, I discovered that I'm listed as #16 on a list of Top 20 Teacher Blogs on the Scholastic Resources web site!
Who Knew?
Investigating a bit, I discovered that I'm listed as #16 on a list of Top 20 Teacher Blogs on the Scholastic Resources web site!
Who Knew?
Friday, September 18, 2009
Double-Take…
Today I took a bold step into the unknown. I subbed a half day, pre-algebra class in middle school.
Up to now, I have limited my subbing experience exclusively to the lower grades (k-6th). Seeing how 6th graders act at the end of the school year, I could just imagine how bad they’d be as 7th and 8th graders. This year I toyed with the idea of just trying out to see how different it might be to sub in the upper grades.
This assignment was perfect for getting a taste of what subbing was like at this level. A half day assignment in the afternoon that included a prep-period had me exposed to only two sections of pre-Algebra class.
Since I hadn’t been at this school before, I arrived early, checked in and went out to my classroom already in progress. The knock at the door was answered by a face that displayed the expressions of surprise, incomprehension, confusion and a blurted “What are YOU doing here”?
With that comment the rest of the class turned to see who the kid, that I know as a “troubled leader” since the 3rd grade, was talking about.
About half of the class recognized me and greeted me with “Hi! Mr. Homework!!” while the other half suddenly seemed very curious and perplexed about this stranger with the odd name.
Now that I had unintentionally interrupted the class, I signaled that they should pay attention and get back to work. After they had been given a math quiz to start, the teacher came over to go over the lesson plan for the day.
“I guess a lot of these kids already know you Mr. Homer?” She said in greeting. I introduced myself as Mr. P while correcting and explaining the misheard nickname.
While the class quietly worked, she went over the lesson plan and answered the few questions I had about how to do the roll since I didn’t have access to the online roll system the teachers use. At the end of the period, she and the class exited the room and I waited for my first introduction to a middle school class.
Both classes were clones of each other.
The first few kids arriving early expecting to see their regular teacher instead saw a “Blast from the Past” as Mr. Homework was standing at the front of the classroom. A few even did double takes before a smile of recognition appeared.
I knew about half of the kids in each period and of course the other half wanted to know what the deal was. Even though I had written my real name on the board, “my” kids kept referring to me as Mr. Homework. A few of the new kids asked about the name but time constraints didn’t allow the telling of the full story. I replied that they should ask one of “my kids” to tell the story after school and left it at that. Both periods ended really well. I had no problems and the kids didn’t act up at all.
I think I like middle school…so far.
Up to now, I have limited my subbing experience exclusively to the lower grades (k-6th). Seeing how 6th graders act at the end of the school year, I could just imagine how bad they’d be as 7th and 8th graders. This year I toyed with the idea of just trying out to see how different it might be to sub in the upper grades.
This assignment was perfect for getting a taste of what subbing was like at this level. A half day assignment in the afternoon that included a prep-period had me exposed to only two sections of pre-Algebra class.
Since I hadn’t been at this school before, I arrived early, checked in and went out to my classroom already in progress. The knock at the door was answered by a face that displayed the expressions of surprise, incomprehension, confusion and a blurted “What are YOU doing here”?
With that comment the rest of the class turned to see who the kid, that I know as a “troubled leader” since the 3rd grade, was talking about.
About half of the class recognized me and greeted me with “Hi! Mr. Homework!!” while the other half suddenly seemed very curious and perplexed about this stranger with the odd name.
Now that I had unintentionally interrupted the class, I signaled that they should pay attention and get back to work. After they had been given a math quiz to start, the teacher came over to go over the lesson plan for the day.
“I guess a lot of these kids already know you Mr. Homer?” She said in greeting. I introduced myself as Mr. P while correcting and explaining the misheard nickname.
While the class quietly worked, she went over the lesson plan and answered the few questions I had about how to do the roll since I didn’t have access to the online roll system the teachers use. At the end of the period, she and the class exited the room and I waited for my first introduction to a middle school class.
Both classes were clones of each other.
The first few kids arriving early expecting to see their regular teacher instead saw a “Blast from the Past” as Mr. Homework was standing at the front of the classroom. A few even did double takes before a smile of recognition appeared.
I knew about half of the kids in each period and of course the other half wanted to know what the deal was. Even though I had written my real name on the board, “my” kids kept referring to me as Mr. Homework. A few of the new kids asked about the name but time constraints didn’t allow the telling of the full story. I replied that they should ask one of “my kids” to tell the story after school and left it at that. Both periods ended really well. I had no problems and the kids didn’t act up at all.
I think I like middle school…so far.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Say "Yes" to "No"
I SO want to try this with my granddaughters to see what happens...
Also...How another group of kids did. One even looks like one of my granddaughters...
(HT to Alexander Rosso over on "This Week in Education")
Also...How another group of kids did. One even looks like one of my granddaughters...
Oh, The Temptation from Steve V on Vimeo.
(HT to Alexander Rosso over on "This Week in Education")
Friday, September 11, 2009
Two Criers and a Khan Man…
Finally back in the classroom after a slow start for this year. The assignment was 1st grade and the teacher warned me that I had two criers in class. She told me that she would be on campus in training and would check in later in the day to see how things were going.
I’m pretty good with little kids. Kids this age don’t hold anything back. Feelings, thoughts, idle curiosity, random urges, everything and anything will eventually be articulated at unexpected times.
They don’t mean anything bad or nasty when they blurt out what might be considered inappropriate or rude comments coming from older kids or adults. It just means they are observant and stating an observation. Situational restraint is a learned behavior. It’s best to acknowledge their comment and try to divert attention to something else.
A little hand goes up in the back row.
Me: “Yes?”
Li’ll guy: “You have no hair on your head!”
Me: “You’re right. Ok, let’s finish taking roll call”
Before she left, the teacher informed me about the criers.
“The girl will quietly sob all day wanting to ‘go home’. The boy is extremely insecure and not at the level of the rest of the class academically. He will probably be hysterically bawling his eyes out before the first recess as he has done every day since school started. Just have the principle come get him as he has done every day since school started.”
My goal today was to see just how much crying I could stand before calling in the heavy guns.
She didn’t warn me about little Khan.
Khan simply ignored me in favor of wandering the room, bugging other kids, getting into stuff that wasn’t his. If there is one thing that can irritate me, it’s a kid that thinks he can ignore me when I call his name.
“He doesn’t speak English” was the explanation from the other kids.
I don’t care if you can’t speak the language. You CAN recognize your own name spoken loudly by the only adult in the room. I know a little “Khan-Man” when I see one.
Even if you can’t speak the language, you can get the idea that you’re supposed to be seated quietly on the floor if I use gestures indicating where you are to sit like every other kid in class is obediently doing.
And for a kid who doesn’t know English, he certainly can communicate, IN ENGLISH, with other kids in class and on the playground when he thinks adults are not paying attention. He also seems to understand English when I mention it’s time for recess, lunch, bathroom, computer lab and cleanup at the end of the day.
When the teacher came back after class to inquire how my day went, she was surprised that the criers made it the whole day without too many tears. She was even more surprised that the principal didn’t have to baby sit the bawler boy today.
I told her that whenever I saw either of the criers start to lose it, I’d call on them to come up and help me “do something” and it was enough to temporality turn off the waterworks. That had to be repeated several times today.
I also told her about my problems with her little “con man”. She related that Mom insists that he acts that way because he doesn’t know English. Mom is in denial and that’s not good. The teacher knows different. She’s seen the same things with his little “con-man” act that I saw today.
I’m pretty good with little kids. Kids this age don’t hold anything back. Feelings, thoughts, idle curiosity, random urges, everything and anything will eventually be articulated at unexpected times.
They don’t mean anything bad or nasty when they blurt out what might be considered inappropriate or rude comments coming from older kids or adults. It just means they are observant and stating an observation. Situational restraint is a learned behavior. It’s best to acknowledge their comment and try to divert attention to something else.
A little hand goes up in the back row.
Me: “Yes?”
Li’ll guy: “You have no hair on your head!”
Me: “You’re right. Ok, let’s finish taking roll call”
Before she left, the teacher informed me about the criers.
“The girl will quietly sob all day wanting to ‘go home’. The boy is extremely insecure and not at the level of the rest of the class academically. He will probably be hysterically bawling his eyes out before the first recess as he has done every day since school started. Just have the principle come get him as he has done every day since school started.”
My goal today was to see just how much crying I could stand before calling in the heavy guns.
She didn’t warn me about little Khan.
Khan simply ignored me in favor of wandering the room, bugging other kids, getting into stuff that wasn’t his. If there is one thing that can irritate me, it’s a kid that thinks he can ignore me when I call his name.
“He doesn’t speak English” was the explanation from the other kids.
I don’t care if you can’t speak the language. You CAN recognize your own name spoken loudly by the only adult in the room. I know a little “Khan-Man” when I see one.
Even if you can’t speak the language, you can get the idea that you’re supposed to be seated quietly on the floor if I use gestures indicating where you are to sit like every other kid in class is obediently doing.
And for a kid who doesn’t know English, he certainly can communicate, IN ENGLISH, with other kids in class and on the playground when he thinks adults are not paying attention. He also seems to understand English when I mention it’s time for recess, lunch, bathroom, computer lab and cleanup at the end of the day.
When the teacher came back after class to inquire how my day went, she was surprised that the criers made it the whole day without too many tears. She was even more surprised that the principal didn’t have to baby sit the bawler boy today.
I told her that whenever I saw either of the criers start to lose it, I’d call on them to come up and help me “do something” and it was enough to temporality turn off the waterworks. That had to be repeated several times today.
I also told her about my problems with her little “con man”. She related that Mom insists that he acts that way because he doesn’t know English. Mom is in denial and that’s not good. The teacher knows different. She’s seen the same things with his little “con-man” act that I saw today.
Wednesday, September 09, 2009
Wednesday, September 02, 2009
California Native Landscape
This post has nothing to do with substitute teaching.
Claudette decided that my eco-friendly, water saving, dead lawn look had to go so...
From here:
To here....
Our California native garden landscape transformation!
(...No! we didn't do it ourselves. We hired professionals)
Claudette decided that my eco-friendly, water saving, dead lawn look had to go so...
From here:
To here....
Our California native garden landscape transformation!
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Tuesday, September 01, 2009
Working or Not Working?
Working or not working? That is the question for the start of this school year.
The normal process for getting an assignment starts with a computerized call to sub a particular class. If I accept, the computer issues the assignment number. Sometimes the school secretary or teacher can enter assignments and get a number directly if the job has been pre-arranged.
I don’t get paid if I don’t have an assignment number.
It’s rare that I don’t have the assignment number before the day of the assignment. On those rare occasions, the school secretary will have an assignment number before end of class day. It’s a risk to work without the number. It all comes down to trust in the teacher and/or the school secretary to not screw up.
The first three calls this year failed to get me a number before class day. The first was corrected the morning I showed up. The teacher called me late the night before asking me to take over for the sub who also got sick that same night. The school office didn’t know there had been a switch but corrected the number to my account.
The second teacher was a definite “maybe” but never followed through. I called the office the day of just in case and was told no absence was requested for her. No harm, no foul. I went back to bed. I didn’t work that day.
Last night, I got an email requesting me for the next day (today). She said she was feeling ill and would put the number into the system if she didn’t think she could teach. As of 11:00pm last night it wasn’t there. As of 6:30am it wasn’t there. Again, I went back to bed.
Logged on the computer at 7:15am and saw an email in the inbox with the lesson plan attached. I would have to shower, shave, dress and be at the school in less than 45min.
I checked the system again to get the assignment number. The district system still says I have no assignments. No one is answering the school office phones either. Go or don’t go?
The teacher evidentially expects me to be there but hasn’t followed through about calling it in. I assume the school will correct the situation and get me the number I need after I get there.
So I arrived at the school a couple of minutes late to check in and explain why I’m there. The secretary informs me that the teacher is absent, but the lady standing next to me at the counter has the assignment number for the class. I’m not working today.
I hate when that happens!
The normal process for getting an assignment starts with a computerized call to sub a particular class. If I accept, the computer issues the assignment number. Sometimes the school secretary or teacher can enter assignments and get a number directly if the job has been pre-arranged.
I don’t get paid if I don’t have an assignment number.
It’s rare that I don’t have the assignment number before the day of the assignment. On those rare occasions, the school secretary will have an assignment number before end of class day. It’s a risk to work without the number. It all comes down to trust in the teacher and/or the school secretary to not screw up.
The first three calls this year failed to get me a number before class day. The first was corrected the morning I showed up. The teacher called me late the night before asking me to take over for the sub who also got sick that same night. The school office didn’t know there had been a switch but corrected the number to my account.
The second teacher was a definite “maybe” but never followed through. I called the office the day of just in case and was told no absence was requested for her. No harm, no foul. I went back to bed. I didn’t work that day.
Last night, I got an email requesting me for the next day (today). She said she was feeling ill and would put the number into the system if she didn’t think she could teach. As of 11:00pm last night it wasn’t there. As of 6:30am it wasn’t there. Again, I went back to bed.
Logged on the computer at 7:15am and saw an email in the inbox with the lesson plan attached. I would have to shower, shave, dress and be at the school in less than 45min.
I checked the system again to get the assignment number. The district system still says I have no assignments. No one is answering the school office phones either. Go or don’t go?
The teacher evidentially expects me to be there but hasn’t followed through about calling it in. I assume the school will correct the situation and get me the number I need after I get there.
So I arrived at the school a couple of minutes late to check in and explain why I’m there. The secretary informs me that the teacher is absent, but the lady standing next to me at the counter has the assignment number for the class. I’m not working today.
I hate when that happens!
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