Exposure Notice!

Possible exposure to almost every kind of communicable malady is sure to appear when dealing with hundreds of kids at dozens of schools. Exposure to everything from head lice, hand, foot and mouth disease, ringworm, and common flu viruses are common but each year something new seems to appear. This year it’s scabies!

It’s almost impossible to be prepared for what comes next, but I'm going to try!

From Blogger Pictures

Happy Halloween!

A Most UN-Typical Day…

I’ve been laid up sick all this week so that’s why I’ve not been posting any personal subbing trauma. I thought I was getting better yesterday afternoon when I took an assignment for minimum day today. I had to cancel it later that afternoon when fits of coughing up pukey colored phlegm made the rebound.

This was the first time in four years I have had to call and cancel an assignment.

Last week I posted “A Typical Day” about how a typical subbing experience should go. I thought it might be interesting to do a very “un-typical day”. This day is derived from a compilation of all the “wrong” things that have happened over the last four years, compressed into one subbing assignment day.

1. Getting the assignment:

Because you weren’t sure if one district would keep you busy enough, you signed up to be a sub in three different districts. Smart thinking! But WHY do they always call at 05:30AM for a 08:00AM assignment? Why do I seem to be only getting calls from the same district? AND…Why is it the farthest commute (30mi) from my house?

We find out later in the school year that the district knows you are signed up for multiple districts and therefore they start calling earlier to make sure all THEIR assignments are filled before the other two get a chance to fill theirs.

2. Getting Ready:

Shower, shave, dress business causal and make sure I have some money to buy lunch.

Wait two more hrs till it’s time to leave for school.

3. Getting There:

I don’t need any maps I got the directions off the internet to get to today’s assignment. I arrive an hour early hoping that I can get in and set up with lots of time to spare before the kids arrive.

The school office is deserted and locked. It turns out that the secretary doesn’t get in for another 20 minutes, so I’m waiting in the car reading a book.

4. After Getting There:

The school secretary finally arrives and my hour lead time has been cut to 45minutes. I try to check in at J.F. Jones School and I’m told that they don’t have me listed for today. More checking and the mystery is solved.

I’m at the wrong school.

Elementary schools are usually named after some prominent politician or school functionary. This is how I end up at J.F. Jones School instead of K.R. Jones School. Who knew that Jones was such a common name and I don’t know the address of K.R. Jones School?

The secretary gives me a district map to K.R. Jones School. By the time I get there I’ve only got 15mins until the kids hit the door.

5. Get Data:

(I forget to check the teacher’s box for lesson plans and attendance sheet)

6. Locate Classroom:

I get the key and hoof it out to the farthest building from the office, to the classroom on the end.

Opening the door, I’m hit with (A: Blast of heat in height of summer or B: An icebox of a classroom in the dead of winter. Take your pick).

The Heating/Air system hasn’t worked for several months. The temperature controls are (A: stuck on or B: not working. Take your pick.)

There is no technician available today to fix it. Class starts in less than 10 minutes.

7. Locate Materials

I can’t locate the lesson plans or attendance sheet in the room. I remember that sometimes they are in the teacher’s box. Mad dash back to the office to find the box has only an attendance sheet.

I notify the secretary that I have no lesson plan and she calls the teacher at home: “I sent it via email to Ms. TeacherNextDoor to print out for him”

There is a sub in for Ms. TeacherNextDoor today so she didn’t get the email. The secretary promises a lesson plan shortly after the start of class.

8. Arrange Materials

Return to the classroom to find indignant teacher informing me that I had morning yard duty and because I didn’t show up for it, she had to cover the whole time for me.

Hurried explanations are all I have time for because half the kids lined up on the playground are already in class and I still have to find mine.

9. Board work

We’re finally in class and I attempt to write my name on the white board. I say attempt because all the “Dry Erase” markers are dry and unusable.

I rummage through the bins next to the overhead projector until I find a nice new black marker. I write my name and date on the board and turn around to questioning hand in the air.

Me: “Yes?”

Kid: “That’s the wrong kind of pen. You can’t erase that kind.”

Looking down, sure enough, it’s a black permanent Sharpie.

10. Attendance

Take attendance and stall for time until the lesson plans have been re-sent to the office secretary, printed and delivered.

“Time for Silent Reading (SSR)”

11. Teach

The plans finally arrive. It’s printed out in size 3 type size and barely readable. I notice that the morning duty has been crossed out, and the after school bus duty appended and written in red ink.

The kids are the worst in every way possible. A good third are on meds for ADD, ADHD, ADADAD and WAS. The others are just out of whack. One even has contagious “ringworm” and the school nurse won’t send him home.

By lunchtime, the room is a complete wreck and I seem to be missing four kids.

12. Lunch

I head for the teacher’s lounge for snack lunch of a candy bar and a diet cola.

To promote “Only Healthy Foods” on campus, the district mandated the removal of all vending machines. This includes the “Teachers Only Lounge”. No Diet Pepsi for me.

With my meager lunch money, I head for the school cafeteria to look over the bill of fare. I didn’t know that they could grow apples the size of golf balls, buy 3oz cartons of milk. Hot dogs, pizza slice or PB&J round out what defines a “Healthy Foods” lunch. Imagine, all that for only twice the price of what the kids pay.

It seems that the “kid’s lunch” is government subsidized while food for adults is not. I’m hungry, but not enough to fork over $4 for minuscule, disgusting food.

I resolve to have lunch “after school”.

13. Afternoon

I luck out. As indicated on the plan, today is one kid’s birthday and his Mom has dropped off cup cakes and juice boxes for all the kids plus a few extra. The four kids I lost earlier have made it back in time for “birthday food”.

There is even enough for the “Substitute Teacher” to hold him over till I can hit the “Healthy Food” McDonalds on the way home.

Today, I learn a valuable lesson. Delay all class parties involving food until recess or after school so ants won’t be attracted by the smeared, “healthy food” cupcake topping, ground into the classroom carpet.

14. Cleanup and Leave Report

The final bell rings and kids race out. I’m exhausted but my day isn’t over yet. Remember? I have “bus duty” that stretches my work day another ½ hour.

I leave a written report for the teacher to let her know how your day went. It was all bad.

I don’t feel like cleaning up the room. I make a half hearted attempt to erase my name in permanent marker from the board. Doesn’t work.

15. Exit the Building

Return the classroom key to the office, sign out, go home and notify the district that I don’t want to sub in their district anymore.

…There will be no next day!

Ringworm Saga Continues …

G5-Day 6

This week finds me back in the same 5th grade classroom with the “Ringworm Kid”.

The Labor Day weekend makes for a short week and the probability of no work since teachers are discouraged from calling in sick after any extended holiday weekend. I therefore took the guaranteed 4-day assignment strictly for the money.

Yesterday (Tues), I received one call from the school health aide asking about today’s bandage check (he didn’t have one) and two calls from the district health nurse asking about a note from the kid’s doctor (he didn’t have one) and the second call letting me know that if she HAD known just WHO the specific kid was (she WAS notified by the school secretary) that she would have handled the situation differently.

She didn’t elaborate what “differently” meant, but tried to convince me that the kid wasn’t likely to be contagious but I should still attempt to avoid any kind of skin contact.

I told her that I wasn’t so much worried about me but more concerned about the other kids at his table pod. He and the kid sitting next to him practically rub elbows with each other. Fortunately, it’s the OTHER arm the “ring” is on…but STILL.

So today, “Ringworm Kid” walks in and I have him show me his ring area to see if his ring is bandaged and IT WAS! The kid also told me that his mom told him to let me know that he used the medicine today.

I guess that’s SOME progress, at least. The school health aide called shortly after class started to ask about the bandage situation and was happy to hear that the parents had finally gotten the message.

That was until…His personal aide walks in and says: “I suppose you already know that I got it?”

Not quite sure what she was referring too, I dumbly ask “Got what?”

She then displayed a bandage on the side of her neck indicating a fresh ringworm infection.

She said: “The district health nurse told me that I couldn’t have got it from “Ringworm Kid” and that I must have gotten it from someone else! Can you believe it?”

I answered in the extreme negative and mentioned something about lack of common sense with the handling of the whole situation. She wholeheartedly agreed.

Shortly thereafter, the school health aide calls down to have me send “Ringworm Kid” over to personally check on the ring status.

“Ringworm Kid” returns with bandage dangling from arm. Seems this particular bandage seems to have lost its adhesive properties after the health aide finished inspection. I sent “Ringworm Kid” back for a NEW bandage.

(Is this fiasco getting too long winded and boring yet?...)

Afternoon, I get yet another call from the school health aide. She’s sending over the custodian to wipe down “Ringworm Kid’s” desk and chair. While he’s here festooned in HazMat-blue rubber gloves, the newly infected “Ringworm Kid” aide has him do the adjacent desk/chair also.

Two more days and I’m outta here no matter what!

Contagious Inclusion …

G5-Day 3

The health aide was manning the front desk this morning, so I had the opportunity to find out more about my ringworm kid situation.

Me: What’s the deal with the boy with ringworm?

I was hoping that he was told not to return to school until he had it cleared up and under control. The answer I received was a bit cryptic.

HealthLady: “He’s an inclusion student”, she intoned as if that summed up the situation.

Me: I looked up “ringworm” and it said it was pretty contagious especially in close quarter classroom settings.

HealthLady: Inclusion students can’t be excluded from the classroom for any reason.

Me: But he’s contagious!

HealthLady: That doesn’t matter. He can’t be excluded.

Me: So what can I do if he shows up today?

HealthLady: Well, if he comes to school and the infected area isn’t covered, send him over and I’ll put a Band-Aid over it to cover it up.

The circular logic here is stupefying. The implied reasoning would dictate that “normal” students with contagious stuff COULD be sent home but “special” students are protected by a blanket waiver even if it means the “black plague” for the rest of us.

As my luck would have it, the kid did show for school this morning.

I asked if he had been to the doctor yesterday after school (probably a violation of his civil rights for me to even ask). He did see a doctor and was given some medicated cream to use.

I asked him if he used the cream this morning (another questionable rights violation, I’m sure) and he said the doctor put some on yesterday but he didn’t use it this morning before coming to school.

I also saw that the “ring” was still visible and uncovered on his inner bicep, so I sent him off to see the “HealthLady” for the promised miracle Band-Aid.

This can’t be right, can it?

The teacher, I'm subbing for emailed and asked if I would be interested in taking his class next week .

I think I’m pushing my luck just finishing out the week tomorrow.

Ringworm Worries! …

G5-Day 2

Only a few of items of note:

It’s damn HOT! Yesterday, today and predictions for the rest of the week are the same. Temperatures are pushing the three digit levels.

Since the math lesson today is “rounding” up and down, it’s safe to say that all this week we’re always rounding up to 100F. At times today, we didn’t even have to do any rounding at all.

Ever see those fools without cars standing at the crosswalk continuously hitting the crosswalk button in the belief that the more you push it, the quicker it will go green?

Well, the A/C controls in all the classrooms in this district are much the same way. The temperature on classroom push button thermostat bottoms out at 70F. This didn’t stop me from giving it a couple of jabs each time I happened to pass by. Even with the A/C running continuously, I don’t think it ever reached its target temperature.

To make matters worse, one of the Special Ed kids in class displayed an alarmingly large sized mark the size of a silver dollar on his arm that looked like ringworm. His classroom aide trundled him off to the health office to hopefully to have him sent home, but it was not to be. The aide returned with student in tow and informed me that the health aide said it did indeed look like ringworm but not to worry saying: “It’s not contagious”.

Asked if anyone else in his family had similar marks, the kid said his brother and cousins all have them.

Almost every source of information I found on the net says something quite the opposite.

From: http://www.healthinsurancequotes.org/ringworm-the-basics/

“…Who is at risk for Ringworm?

Anyone can get Ringworm. Scalp Ringworm often strikes young children; outbreaks have been recognized in schools, day-care centers, and infant nurseries. School athletes are at risk for scalp Ringworm, Ringworm of the body, and foot Ringworm; there have been outbreaks among high school wrestling teams. Children with young pets are at increased risk for Ringworm of the body.

…”

I think I’ll have a little chat with the health aide if this kid shows up in class tomorrow.

Teaching Makes You Sick?...

And you just thought all you had to worry about was kid boogers...
Full story here

Reuters
by Amy Norton Thu Aug 18, 1:31 PM ET

NEW YORK (Reuters Health) - A wide range of occupations, from farming to teaching, may be potential risk factors for degenerative brain diseases, such as Alzheimer's and Parkinson's disease, research findings suggest.

In a study of more than 2.6 million U.S. death records, researchers found that a variety of jobs were associated with an increased risk of death from several forms of brain degeneration, namely Alzheimer's and Parkinson's disease, early-onset dementia and motor neuron disease

Many of the associations had been seen in earlier research and could potentially be explained by on-the-job exposures to the chemicals that farmers, welders and hairdressers routinely use or inhale.

Other findings, however, such as the elevated disease risks among teachers, clergy and bank tellers, are not easily explained, according to the researchers, led by Robert M. Park of the National Institute for Occupational Safety and Health, Cincinnati, Ohio.

Studies such as this, where death certificates are used to find associations between occupation and disease risk, have their limits. For one, death records are a less-than-ideal measure of a person's work history, Park told Reuters Health.

"At best," he noted, such research can tease out general patterns that can then be studied further.

In their analysis, Park and his colleagues found that the bank tellers, clergy, aircraft mechanics and hairdressers had highest odds of dying from Alzheimer's disease. For Parkinson's disease, the highest risks were among biological scientists, teachers, clergy members and other religious workers.

SOURCE: American Journal of Industrial Medicine, July 2005.

Exposed!......

I was the sub for the long term sub for this 1st grade class. Evidentially, there have been a number of sub’s working this class. From the comments I heard from other teachers, I think the long term sub is due to return to short term sub assignments.

During the break, one of the other 1st grade teachers came to the teachers lounge and handed everyone an “Exposure Notice”. Evidentially one of her kids left after an hour into the lessons with a diagnosis of contagious “Hand, Foot and Mouth” disease (coxsackie virus). Great…I guess this is what they mean by occupational hazard.

The name sounds like that scary “mad cow” stuff. While I’m sure this isn’t anything in the same league, I can’t help visualizing 15-20 kids whirling around the classroom, spewing saliva then collapsing in big heap.