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Tuesday, August 14, 2007

The Devil Didn't Make Him Do It...

It was Asperger's!

For the whole story, click-> From the Fox Dallas-Fort Worth News:

"...a former substitute teacher for the Plano School District was on trial Wednesday accused of sexual performance of a child and sexual assault of a child.

His lawyer, John Hardin, said Pearce admitted to taking sexually explicit photos of the 15-year-old girl while working as a substitute teacher at Willams High School.

"Clearly the pictures were taken, but the act of sexual contact we adamantly deny ," Hardin said.

Hardin said Pearce took the pictures because he has Asperger's Syndrome, which affects his social behavior.

---------------------------

I don't really care what this guy's real problem is, he doesn't belong around kids. Starting with this case, I predict a slew of "Asperger defense" strategies in future court cases.


DallasNews UPDATE!!
...A Collin County jury late Tuesday sentenced a former substitute teacher in Plano and Richardson schools to 15 years in prison for taking nude photographs of a 15-year-old student.

...Mr. Pearce – grandson of the late Richardson ISD Superintendent J.J. Pearce, after whom a high school is named – showed no reaction as the sentence was read.

...Mr. Pearce's mother, Linda Pearce, cried throughout her testimony on her son's behalf Tuesday.

"He needs help, and I should have given it to him," she said.

Mr. Pearce's defense attorney argued during the trial that his client had Asperger's syndrome, an autism disorder that affected his ability to read social cues. But Mr. Allen said that Mr. Pearce was an irresponsible teacher who endangered his students.


---------------------------

Evidentially, the jury didn't buy this guys lame defense.


Saturday, August 11, 2007

Memorable Escapes...

Another blog (The Man Fan Club) that I read occasionally posed a question:
Why does it always seem like we remember the bad things that happen to us?

His close call with a city civil servant on patrol can be read here: Thankful Moments

I have to admit that he might have a point. Most of the recollections I have encountering officers of the law on the road haven't been the happy kind, but there WAS that one memorable escape...

It was many years ago on a Sunday morning when the national speed limit was still 55mph to "save gas". I was cruising in the center lane on the 101 toward San Francisco without paying attention to the speed.

It was an unusually rare moment in that I was the only car on a nearly empty freeway. Because it was sunny, no traffic in front or on either side, I hadn't been checking the rear view in a while.

When I finally did, I was startled to find a guy tailgating me. Not just some guy but one of those city civil servants on patrol.

Instantly, I check my speed (10mph over. S--T!) and felt my mood instantly sink.

Just as the cop hit the red & blues to pull me over, a nut job in a bright yellow convertible PASSES us both doing 70+ in the left hand lane.

How do you ignore a cop with lights flashing IN FRONT of you?

While I deserved the ticket, He/She deserved one more and there was only one cop on the scene to hand them out.

Saturday, August 04, 2007

Dear Slightly Less Valued Substitute…

The substitute teacher information packet arrived Friday afternoon from one of the school districts I used to work for.

Dear Valued Substitute…

Welcome to the 2007-2008 school year. Substitutes provide a valuable service to the district; one which is essential to the successful operation of our educational programs.

We could not continue our excellent instructional programs without your willingness to substitute in the absence of our regular employees.

We are still actively recruiting substitutes for our district. If you know of someone who is interested… blah, blah, blah….

Once again, welcome to the district for the 2007-2008 school year. We look forward to your participation…”

The only essential piece of information packet info I’m interested in this school year is: daily pay rate that is buried under “general information” toward the end of the “Substitute Teacher Handbook”

Because this district’s previous daily rate was slightly less than a neighboring district, I didn’t work for them very much last year. Instead, I opted to work in the neighboring district for obvious reasons.

It seems that other substitutes were doing the same, because half way through last year this district sent out a notice that they were increasing the daily rate to exactly match their neighbor district.

I guess it didn’t work because the information packet for this coming school year rescinded that increase back to the original rate.

Dear Slightly Less Valued Substitute…

Welcome to the 2007-2008 school year. Substitutes provide an approximate 4% less valued service to our district; one which is, evidentially, less essential to the successful operation of our educational programs this year.

We found that we COULD continue our excellent instructional programs with your willingness to take a 4% cut in pay to substitute in the absence of our regular, more valuable, employees.

Because we cut your daily pay rate back by 4%, we are saving money but are still actively recruiting clueless substitutes for our district. If you know of someone who doesn’t mind working cheap… blah, blah, blah….

Once again, welcome to the district for the 2007-2008 school year. We look forward to your continued participation…”

I guarantee there will be at least ONE substitute less this year.

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Gearing Up For School...

The new school year starts 8/27 and it’s time to gear up to be ready for it.

By “gear up”, I mean that in the literal sense. I was hoping to make it through at least one more year with “school car”, but in the last month or so I seem to have lost 40% of the gears on my manual stick Saturn and it also, desperately, needs new tires.

Try accelerating from the stop light when it goes green while the guy behind you starts honking because you stalled it trying to start in 3rd gear.

I finally took it in to the local mechanic this week to see just how much damage to the bank account it was going to take to restore 1st and 2nd gears.

My dilemma comes down to deciding if I should dump the required cash for repairs to keep it going for another year or attempt to replace it with someone else’s decent ride that might be in better condition for about the same money? If I have transmission problems I know that’s BIG bucks. (…and not FUJI bucks, either)

Luckily, the problem turned out to be a broken shifter. The transmission and clutch are still just fine. It looks like the $250 to get it back functioning is still worth keeping it.

Now I’m crossing my fingers and hoping that “school car” doesn’t get a flat before the first new school year subbing check shows up at the end of September.

If I can hold out for a while maybe I can get me a NEW cheap Tata Motors putt putt.






Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Carnival of Education -- Issue 129

The 129th issue of Carnival of Education is on the bookshelves right next to that new gardening book that seems very popular these days.

Something about a guy named Harry and his job as a potter.

Monday, July 23, 2007

Math Methods Lead to Madness…

I’m not a lone critic of the push to have elementary schools adopt constructivist math instruction like TERC (pronounced "turk") Investigations or Everyday Mathematics as a replacement for traditional multiplication and division instruction.

Take a look at a few demonstration samples of what I’m talking about:

Can you readily explain how and/or why these methods work at a level I can use for 4rd graders?

Frankly, learning a method without understanding the “how” or more importantly, the “why” is just as cryptic as the one “Ma&Pa Kettle” demonstrates for us:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=5wkK0yHx5Go






Although, I did find this one has potential if it can be demonstrated as reliable and repeatable:

(Calculator method) http://youtube.com/watch?v=owMjAbkU1eE





Hummm…

http://youtube.com/watch?v=w-M8qUbqJjc


Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Being Paranoid?

It's probably just a coincidence that my “Emergency 30-Day Substitute Teacher Permit” arrived in the mail on the same day as someone from the Santa Clara County Office of Education visited the blog.

But then again...

Monday, July 16, 2007

Pray For One Hour?

Lesson plan entry for substitute teacher:
01:00pm - Pray for one hour

She thought is was a typo that might have been:
01:00pm - "Play for one hour"

Nope...

Thursday, July 12, 2007

Substitute Teacher Credential Rip-off…

One of the irksome facets of substitute teaching in California, is that I have to renew my “Emergency 30-Day Substitute Teacher Permit” each year to be eligible to work. The renewal fee is about ½ a day’s pay.

I have to pay THEM for the privilege of working and it’s not even deductible.

Sunday, July 08, 2007

Murphy Bed Sofa Combo...

We just returned from our timeshare week at the Kaua'i Marriott Beach Club and could bore everyone with the day by day minutia of each fantastic adventure but I shall resist. The pictures in the last post speak for themselves.

The only unique feature worthy of interest (at least to me) is a new take on the "old sofa bed for the guests" feature. We shared our accommodations with my cousin and her husband. They report that the "Murphy bed sofa combo" is a HIT!

See the conversion in action:

Monday, June 25, 2007

On Hiatus Until Further Notice...

There will be few if any postings for a week or so while we go here for a little R&R ->



Brownie points to all (except Gary) who know where this is...

(Click images for fun/sun sized view)

Friday, June 22, 2007

The Real H-1B Visa System...

From BusinessWeek: Outsourcing: How to Skirt the Law
June 22, 2007, 12:01AM EST

------------------------------------------------------------------------
...Want to hire cheaper foreign workers instead of Americans? A lawyer tells you how to game the immigration system—and it's all on YouTube"

"...It's a group of lawyers openly discussing strategies for helping their clients pretend that they're trying to recruit American workers—as required by law—while they, in fact, hire cheaper foreign workers...

"[O]ur goal is clearly not to find a qualified and interested U.S. worker," ... The trick, according to Cohen & Grigsby attorneys, is to only go through the motions of hiring Americans without ever intending to.
..."

------------------------------------------------------------------------
Click the link at the top of this entry to read the entire article.


The practice described in this "training video" isn't top secret. Any engineer in the industry knows how this is done. It's obvious, blatant and common practice.

To hear anyone on the inside actually talk about it in public and allow it to be taped IS amazing.

The only thing driving this flawed H-1B system is money. So how should this flagrant abuse be fixed?

Since the single motive here is money, specifically the disparity in the amount of money required to employ and keep a U.S. hire .vs. an H-1B, the solution is simple.

Eliminate the cost disparity.

Either US workers will have to be willing to work the job at the same wage as H-1B's and also work for reduced company paid benefit packages to equalize the cost of using an H-1B hire.

--or--

The government increases the cost of using an H-1B hire to nullify the cost differential.

Let's have the government eliminate the yearly call for increasing the H-1B quota, charge $1m for each H-1B visa granted and charge a yearly fee of $100k to keep it.

I predict that companies would suddenly find lots and lots of "qualified" U.S. engineers.

This would be a win/win/win solution. More U.S. workers have jobs, the companies that still need imported workers could hire as many H-1B's as they could afford and the government gets a new income source to help offset the budget deficit.

Anyone else have a better idea? Use the comments section and if I see a better solution, I'll append it here.

(I wonder if "Carbon Life Form Offset Credits" would work in this situation? Quick, get Al on the phone!...)

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Substitute Teacher - WHY?

I'm convinced that one, more or all of these people HAVE been or ARE substitute teachers.

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Final Tally: 2006-2007

Days teaching at specific grade level this year:
K: 2
G1: 4
G2: 4
G3: 5
G4: 15
G5: 32
G6: 23
Total Sub Days for the just completed 2006-07 School Year: 85 days
Since I started subbing Sept/2004, I have a total of 230 days.

Monday, June 18, 2007

Japanese speed drills...

Possible gamers approach to piano instruction? I wonder if it could be adapted to classroom math speed drills...

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Thank You …

I have on occasion left the windows down in the car parked in the driveway or have forgotten to close the garage door over night without things being missing the next day.

Not so this time.

To the guy (or guys) who visited my garage sometime in the wee hours of Saturday morning to “borrow” my air compressor, rolling tool box and power tools:

Thank You!

Thanks for not taking either car parked in the garage. (I suppose you might have thought about it if I had left the keys on the seat.)

Thanks for not trashing the rest of the garage just for the hell of it.

Thanks for taking care to not damage either car while rolling my tool box between the cars.

Thanks for reminding me that I need to be more vigilant about locking up at night.

If you do grow out of this phase of your life and become an upstanding citizen, maybe you’ll apply for a teaching position, a job that requires a security clearance or something else that requires a background security check.

The police think they got a few good prints from a second tool box you looked into but didn’t take so maybe someday I can “thank you” in person.

I certainly hope so…

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Amazing Amateur Nature Video...

I carry some PBS Nature type videos in my substitute teacher kit for those "just in case" situations when the lesson plan comes up a little short to fill the available class time.

The ones I pick tend to be entertaining insect, plant life and bird behavior type stuff while avoiding any of the more sensational large animal on animal predation action like this one appears to be:

(Don't worry, it comes out ok...in THIS one)

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Julie Amero Is Getting a "Do-Over"..

"...Julie Amero is a former Kelly Middle School substitute teacher who, as of June 6th, 2007, has been granted a new trial. After her initial trial, Amero was convicted on January 5th, 2007 in Norwich, Connecticut superior court of four counts of risk of injury to a minor, or impairing the morals of a child."

From Wikipedia, the free eneyelopedia: Julie Amero

So instead of backing down in the face of common sense and overwhelming expert evidence to the contrary, we're going to have a "Do-Over" trial.

I hope Julie counter sues for court costs and damages...

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

End of Year Lesson Plans …

Substitute teaching the last couple weeks involves less and less actual book work. Instead we have lots more busy worksheets, videos and extended unstructured PE…another word for recess for almost two hours.

This last week we also have:

  • Square dancing (4th graders)
  • Seat moving day (5th graders)…WHY with just two weeks left?
  • Timed Sudoku for prizes (6th graders)
  • We have movies, lots and lots of movies

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Least Favored School…

EG8-G6

I got a late call, half day assignment for 6th grade this afternoon. I wasn’t too sure I wanted to take it because it was for one of my least favorite schools. I’m not sure what it is about this school but I haven’t had much luck with classroom control here. But Monday was a holiday and I hadn’t had any luck in picking up a class yesterday so I took a chance today to see if my bias was still valid.

The principal was running the class when I arrived. Twenty girls and ten boys. I was to be with them for only about two total classroom hours today.

Right from the start, one boy, S---- was in my face, bouncing off the walls, interrupting and interacting with other kids in class.

He was literally absorbing, extruding, evacuating and sucking all my attention and patience to just try and keep him from disrupting the whole class.

Early on I learned not to let students leave their seat to ask me questions. Unless they are seated and raise their hand first, I don’t acknowledge them. If they approach, I cut them off with: “Is this the proper way to ask me any questions? Back to your seat, raise hand and I’ll come to you when I can.”

It sometimes takes two or three repetitions to get everyone onboard but it’s necessary. If I don’t, I discover myself surrounded by kids firing endless questions while the rest of the class is walking around the classroom all day.

S---- literally could not perform this simple instruction.

Whenever he would shout out some inane, off topic question he was always walking half way to the front of the room. Each time I would make him walk back to his seat and only address his question when his hand was raised.

An hour later I was happy to escape to the teachers lounge while they went to lunch.

One of the other teachers asked how my day was going. I told her it might be a lot better if I could just get rid of one kid. She knew right away who I was referring to.

She clued me into this kid’s problems. He has ADHD and Asperger’s syndrome. He has a one-on-one aide to be with him in class. He has a whole slew of stuff he’s allowed to do in class that the other kids aren’t. He’s allowed to chew gum to help him concentrate and use a special mechanical pencil so he doesn’t eat the wooden ones. It seems that S---- has a long five year history with school staff and everyone except unsuspecting substitute teachers know about his condition.

When I commented that I hadn’t seen the aide in class today, she told me he’s only with the aide for two hours…in the morning.

None of this information was in the special instructions on the sub assignment line or in the lesson plan. Coming in, I’m thinking this kid just has a mongo case of WAS.

After lunch, I tried a bribe. I had a recent issue of Car and Driver magazine in my backpack and offered it to S---- to keep if he could sit quietly for just five minutes so I could go over the instructions for the science test. He indicated that he could, but within two minutes he’s literally banging his head on the table and barking like a dog. I called the office for someone to get him before he hurt himself.

He resisted leaving but finally left while loudly protesting to the office staff lady that it was everyone else in class that got him into trouble. “It wasn’t my fault!!”

Twenty minutes into the science test, the principal calls to ask for two of the boys to come to the office relating to the S---- situation. It seems that S---- is making claims that these two were responsible for getting him into trouble.

When I asked if they could come down after the test, he said “No, they need to come down now.”

No questions for me about how this kid was acting in class? This school will remain on my “least favored” list for another year.

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Not Everything We Learn In School …

Claudette and I were visiting our grandkids, Paige and Nathan, this weekend. At 2 ½, our first granddaughter, Paige, is well into the cute mastery of baby speech and inventive communication that Grammie and I adore.

We hung around long enough to be invited to stay for pizza from their favorite pie house. When the pizza arrived, everyone seated and everyone served, Paige spotted the two packets of mild hot sauce that came with the pizza.

“Paigie have dippin’ sauce too?”

Momma tried explaining, without much success, that the “sauce” wasn’t the same as the stuff from the local McD’s, and it wasn’t good for little girls.

“It’s too hot and tastes icky!” Momma said while making a sour face.

But Paige was not to be dissuaded. After several pouty demands for “sauce”, Momma finally relented.

Daddy squeezed a thimble size blob of “sauce” on the plate while Paige, happily, bounced up and down in her chair.

The rest of the adults at the table, baby brother could care less, stopped eating while we watched our precious little girl pick up a bite size piece of veggie pizza and carefully dip and take the first bite.

“Ummm”… followed by a surprised look… followed by a wide eyed look… as she put the rest of pizza piece back on the plate and reached with both hands toward Momma whose hands were full with baby brother.

As momma instructed “Drink some milk, sweetie” Paige quickly obeyed.

“That works!” and before Daddy could stop her, she picked up another piece of pizza, dipped it in the sauce and popped it once more in her mouth.

“HOT again!” while she grabbed up the pink plastic milk cup again.

About to repeat the process a third time, Daddy intervened and removed her plate in exchange for a clean one without “hot sauce”.

“Wipe your face, sweetie” instructed Momma and she spotted a couple bits of cheese and avocado on Paige’s chin.

Obediently, Paige used a big napkin and dutifully wiped. She paused and then stuck out her little pink tongue began wiping it repeatedly with the napkin as the “heat” was still plainly evident.

"That's my daughter!" Daddy, who has an affinity for Hananero stuffed olives, proudly announced.


Monday, May 28, 2007

Need a Good Laugh?

They say laughter is contagious. Let’s try it times four…






Well? Is it?

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

NHL and Global Warming...

Interesting documentary dealing with the Global Warming Hockey Stick graph. Good news! The Stanley Cup playoffs won't be melted out!

(Go Ducks!)

Run time: 44 minutes

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Julie Delayed Again...

Sentencing for Julie Amero, the former substitute teacher convicted of exposing seventh-grade students at Kelly Middle School in Norwich to pornographic images was postponed again (#4 ??) until June 6th.

I wonder if this sets some kind of record for sentencing postponements?

That school is SO screwed...

Friday, May 18, 2007

I Don't Get It...

I think I had this guy in one of the 6th grade classes I subbed this year...


Tuesday, May 15, 2007

I Don’t Now...

Exactly one month till summer break. STAR testing is complete the kids aren’t really into class work anymore this year.

The only activity of substance for this 6th grade class today was a history test on China. The lesson allowed 15 minutes for the students have a personal or table group review of the section and then 45 minutes to take and complete the two page test.

Unlike the multiple choice answer selections for the majority of the test, the last two questions require a written answer to the question. Something about why emperor “so-and-so” (I forgot the name) implemented a civil service test for people applying for positions in the government.

“I don’t get it!”

This is from one boy in the back, so I circle around to ask just what he “doesn’t get”.

Me: What is it that you “don’t get”?
Kid: The whole thing, pointing to the last two essay questions.

Me: Did you read about “Emperor so-and-so”?
Kid: Yea.

Me: Did you read anything about a “civil service” test?
Kid: Yea, I think so.

Me: So why did he want the people to take a civil service test?
Kid: I don’t know…

Me: Do you know what a civil service test is?
Kid: No.

Me: Then write that.
Kid: Write what?

Me: Write “I don’t know”
Kid: Ok…
(Kid writes “I don’t now”) for both the remaining two questions.

Me: (sigh) When will you?
Kid: Will what?
Me: You wrote “I don’t now”. Does that mean you will know “later”?
Kid: Ohhhh….

(Kid erases “now”, and prints “no”)

Tuned out, checked out, and just plain “out”…

Monday, May 14, 2007

For Math Geeks...

Took the day off, so for the other fellow math geeks out there we have...

(For those who want to sing along, here are the lyrics)

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Teacher's prank goes too far...

From the Tennessean.com story:

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MURFREESBORO — Parents of students at a Scales Elementary school in Murfreesboro Tennessee are outraged that teachers and an assistant principal staged a phony gun attack on their children, telling them repeatedly it was not a drill, while the children cried and took shelter under tables.
--------------------------------------------------------------------

Click the link above for the whole story but this school should be awarded an honorable mention Group Darwin Award of Education.

Stop Signal Seminar (SSS) …

Five weeks left in this school year and all the kids already seemed to have checked out.

Friday was the completion of a two day stint in the “stacked deck” 6th grade. This teacher must have pissed someone off because 25% of this class was stacked with KWA’s ( Kids With Attitude) …and not the good kind!

A teacher at break time inquired: “how’s it goin”? I mentioned that some of them were trying real hard to see how far to push. The teacher rattled off a list of names guessing which ones were the pushers.

She got six of them right.

By 11:00am, I had enough of the “fist pounding”, “rolly-eye-gasps” and “ahh-MAN’s” I could stand from one of the ring leaders. I booted him to the principle’s office with a phone call for “disrespectful attitude in class”.

At this point I decided to give a little seminar. I explained that since not many, in particular “rolly-eyes”, seem to be able to read my mood today, I should make it very clear when you are about to cross a line.

“If I say ‘STOP’ and you continue whatever it is that you are doing, then you are out the door to follow ‘rolly-eyes’. Does everyone UNDERSTAND that?”

Lots of quiet and head nodding verified that I seemed to have communicated my message of the day.

Later at lunch, I thanked the principle for his help in handling “rolly-eyes”. He told me it wasn’t a problem and he totally understood that sometimes you have to make a sacrificial example of one kid to show you mean business.

I’m glad that this district seems to have school administrators that help rather than hinder classroom management.

Rolly-eyes rejoined us after lunch and I had to repeat my “SSS” so he couldn’t claim ignorance.

It wasn’t long after when he started to act up and I looked him dead in the eye and quietly said “Stop”.

It almost appeared that he was going to ignore me when his posse, who seemed to be faster on the uptake, intervened and said: “Dude! He said “Stop”! He’s not playin!”

There was a momentary pause but rolly-eyes backed down with a final hostile stare. We now had us an understanding for the rest of the day.

I believe that I’ll be adding my “Stop Signal Seminar” to the regular repertoire, when needed, in future assignments.

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Troubles solved at the 118th Carnival of Education...

Well the wife is off on a 16 day tour to Nice/Provence/Paris tonight so my problem for the next two weeks is...

"Do I learn how to operate the washing machine or just go buy extra underwear?"

Maybe I can discover an answer to my dilemma over at the troubled NYC Educator as this week's host of the Carnival of Education issue 118.

Thursday, May 03, 2007

This Week’s Fine Whines…

Do we gotta?
What are we doing now?
What are we gonna do next?
We already did that!
The teacher doesn’t do it that way!

Can I go to the bathroom?
Can I get a drink?

I don’t get it!
I STILL don’t get it!
What page are we on?

It’s almost time for recess!
Can we have extra recess time?
It’s almost time for lunch!
You know we go to lunch early, right?

Do we hafta ___?
Why do we hafta ___?

He hit me!
She won’t stop bothering me!
He said a bad word!
What homework were we s’posta do?

I don’t have anything to read!
I don’t wanna read!
It’s too hard!
This book is boring!

I don’t have a pencil!
I don’t have a piece of paper!
How many sentences does the paragraph have to be?
Can we work in groups? (Followed by…) Why not??
Is this going to count?

Did you just write my name down?

Monday, April 30, 2007

I Get Letters...

Had a good time in last Friday's 3rd grade class...



Third graders are still in the "we like school" mode...

Friday, April 27, 2007

Court of Common Sense…

Have you ever read the warning list of disclaimers on ladders, microwaves and anything else you’ve ever purchased? You just know that all the stupid things they warn against is the result of someone suing for doing something stupid.

For years I have felt there should be some way to reject all those groundless, baseless, obviously wrong, money and time wasting legal exercises of our sometimes peculiar legal system.

Anyone can sue for anything.

Winning or defending against a suit is a time consuming and expensive process. Most of the time it seems that whoever hired the better liar lawyer, is the one who comes out on top. Other times, jury selection seems less like a “jury of your peers” and more like a “jury of the most gullible and/or uninformed”.

I have long felt that there should be some process to weed out the obvious.

Maybe a “Court of Common Sense” whose job it is to pre-examine the facts and accusations of selected lawsuits to decide if it passes the smell test of “common sense” before allowing it to proceed farther up the legal food chain.

Possibility a panel of individuals, generally considered to be “rational and relatively intelligent”, would by majority vote decide if a legal filing is reasonable enough proceed or be rejected on the grounds as “just plain stupid”. I’ll forego any ideas, for the moment, of how the selection of “rational and relatively intelligent people” should be accomplished, but I’m not ready to give up on the idea.

In the case of Julie Amero and the recently announced third sentencing delay, it appears that there are so many things wrong with the original indictment that the D.A. and the court seem to be looking for ways to just make it all go away while saving as much face as possible.

I’m sure if my “Court of Common Sense” currently existed; the case would have been dispatched long before it ever reached the level a trial let alone the conviction and possible 40yr. jail sentence.

My “Court of Common Sense” would have surely concluded, before indictment, that computer porn pop-ups are a fact of life these days and Julie was just the innocent, victim bystander of the day.

My “Court of Common Sense” would have had the school “Say sorry” to Julie and maybe send her home with some instruction on what to do with the computer next time if it ever happened again.

My “Court of Common Sense” might also suggest the school remove the computer from the classroom until they get someone competent enough to maintain the computer with up-to-date software.

Case dismissed…

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Nothing Much Happenin'...

Evidently I'm on "vacation".
No calls this week.
So let's see what's on the ole' YouTube...


"What am I going to do??? I could always design software!..."
--Paddlin' Peggy

Monday, April 23, 2007

Holy S---!

Literally!!
--------------------
MUMBAI (Reuters) - Indian teachers sprinkled cow urine on low-caste students to purify them and drive away evil, reports said on Saturday, in a country where millions of people remain oppressed at the bottom of the ancient Hindu caste system.

Upper-caste headteacher Sharad Kaithade ordered the ritual after taking over from a lower-caste predecessor at a school in a remote village in the western state of Maharashtra earlier this month, the Times of India reported.

He told an upper-caste colleague to spray cow urine in a cleansing ceremony as the students were taking an examination, wetting their faces and their answer sheets, the newspaper said.

"She said you'll study well after getting purified," student Rajat Washnik was quoted as saying by the CNN-IBN news channel.

Students said they felt humiliated.
--------------------

Substitute lesson plan for the day:
1) Take roll and lunch count
2) Pass out the test papers
3) Sprinkle a little cow urine...



Saturday, April 21, 2007

What’s Yer Job?…

Spring break has ended and the sub-season has reopened. No call on Monday and I missed the first call on Tuesday. I didn’t mind missing the Tuesday call. I was feeling down about sending checks for taxes owed to Uncle Sam and Gov. Terminator.

I did sub one 6th grade and two 5th grades on Wed, Thur and Friday. The lesson plans for all three assignments were all pretty much “time killers” and not much in the way of any actual educational substance. As a result, my personal pain threshold to in class noise is considerably higher than it was two weeks ago. Maybe it’s just my personal apathy this time of the year.

The only note worthy comment came from one boy in Thursday’s 5th grade class. Evidentially, they’ve only had “girl” subs before me.

Kid: What’s yer job?
Me: What do you mean? I’m the substitute teacher.

Kid: No, I mean your REAL job?
Me: You don’t think “substitute teacher” is a REAL job?

Kid: What I mean is…the other substitutes are “Moms”. So I just thought you took the day off from work to come in to be the substitute.

It’s a simplistic yet somehow insightful view of my job from a 5th grader and not too far off the mark. A “Dad” with a “real job” COULD, if he was crazy enough, take the day off work and do my job. It’s not quite how I started doing this but it’s not impossible.

Substitute teaching doesn’t require any “substitute teacher” training, apprenticeship or instruction manual. It’s all OJT (On the Job Training) from day one.

It DOES help, though, to BE a Dad (or a Mom) when it comes to handling kids. But that is a different OJT job in itself.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

114th Carnival of Education...

The midway to the 114th Carnival of Education is open for business. "Hop" on over (Easter vacation, get it?) and see what hidden Easter eggs of information you can find.


Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Four R’s…

G6

I was in the local Costco yesterday with discount coupon book in hand looking for the $2.00 off two-pack of Reynolds Wrap Quality Aluminum Foil when I heard someone call out “Hi, Mr. Homework!!” It’s still Spring Break so I wasn’t expecting to interact with any school kids until next week.

Momentarily stunned, I turned and looked at a happy cheerful smile of the typical “generic” 6th grader. Now I sub in two different school districts, seven grade levels, an average of three classrooms at each grade level and an average of thirty kids per class so of course I didn’t recognize her and had to subject myself to confessing as much.

She told me the school (nope, not yet). The class (getting warmer…). Her teacher's name Mr. Fuji --- (BINGO!).

Me: “Now I remember your class. It’s the class with all the jobs, right?”
Her: “…and the bet” she added helpfully.

I DID remember this class and their teacher Mr. Fuji . I wrote some notes about that class that I had meant to use in a post about this amazing teacher and his classroom concept but hadn’t yet gotten around to doing it.

I first met Mr. Fuji in the teachers lounge at lunch a week before the assignment. He mentioned that he needed a sub and wanted to know if I was available. Before accepting, I jokingly asked if he had a “good class”. Mr. Fuji bet me that they would be on their best behavior or he would give me $100 if they got anything less than a good report from me. Evidentially, he had warned his class about the $100 bet and he didn’t want to pay up.

Now that’s a confident teacher.

On morning of the assignment, it only took me a few minutes to go over the lesson plan and materials. Mr. Fuji is super organized and detailed.

Fifteen minutes before class there was a knock and and a head peeking around the door.
“Can I come in to do desk checking? It’s my job!”

Now, I have been in lots of classes at all levels where the kids have “jobs”. Line leader, paper passer, homework checker, phone secretary are the familiar kid type jobs that I recognize. “Desk Checker” (DC) was a new one for me and prompted the following dialog:

Me: Just what does a desk checker do?
DC: I check each desk to make sure the books are neat, no junk on the floor and no garbage on the top.

Me: …and if you find something wrong?
DC: They get a fine of $10FB (Fuji Bucks) which I split with Mr. Fuji

After a few more minutes of Q/A with Mr. DC, I discovered that Mr. Fuji rents the school desks to the students for $20FB/mo.

Evidentially, in addition to the standard Three R’s of education, Mr. Fuji adds a dose of a fourth ‘R’ as in “Real Life”.

Throughout the rest of the day, I was able to delve deeper into how intricately this classroom society operates.

There are two class accountants that maintain student checking accounts for each kid on the teacher’s computer. The kids all have homemade wallets where they carry their spare $FB spending money and ALL the kids have one or more jobs to pay their desk rent.

Mr. Fuji requires the kids submit written job applications to the class CEO to apply for any one or more of 41 designated classroom jobs.

Job pay scales differ according to difficulty, responsibility and time. Some jobs, like “desk checker” are on a commission basis. Commissioned income is split 50/50 with Mr. Fuji .

There are no tenured jobs (sorry teachers) and the CEO can hire/fire the employees for bad job performance or misuse of job authority. This keeps the “Desk Checker” from padding his take with excessive fines.

Mr. Fuji can hire/fire the CEO if abuse of power or favoritism becomes a problem.

In addition to “desk rent”, FBucks are used bathroom breaks, water breaks, new pencils and other small classroom supplies.

FBucks can also be used for daily rent one of four cushy, swivel chairs at $5FB/day, buy an empty spare desk for $200FB as an alternate personal desk or rent it out to other kids at $20FB/mo.

A couple of times during the year, Mr. Fuji will hold a swap meet where the kids can buy, sell or trade their personal stuff from home with their parent’s permission and an end of year party where remaining $FB can be used for food and drink.

(Mr. Fuji told me that he started requiring “parent notes” for all items after an incident where one kid brought his Dad’s CD collection to a swap meet without asking…)

Class Job List and weekly pay rate (C is commission)

Zoo Keeper

15

Waste Management

5

Zoo Keeper Asst.

5

Games

5

Newspaper Editor

100

Recycling

5

Gardener

15

Attendance

5

AR Chart Monitor

15

Tutors

C

Filer

15

Paper Distributors

10

Bench Monitor

25

Maid/Butler

15

Librarian

10

Ball Monitor

5

Door Monitor

5

Tardy Monitor

C

Grade Book

75

Substitute

10

Homework Checker

35

Floor Checker

C

Accountant

75

Addenda Checker

10

Accountant Asst

35

Student of the Week

15

Phone

35

Personal Reminder

15

Dictionary Monitor

10

DOL Monitor

20

A/C Monitor

5

CEO

50

Computer Monitor

20

Art Bin Monitor

C

Secretary

C

HW Board

15

Desk Checker

C

Handouts

5

Personal Asst

50

Kinder Bus Monitor

5

Classroom Nurse

5




My final query of the day asked the ultimate “What if?” question.

Me: What if someone doesn’t have enough to pay their desk rent?
Class: They can borrow from a friend or the bank.

Me: What if someone doesn’t want to do a job and refuses to pay rent?
Class: Then they are on “welfare” and we all have to chip in and pay the rent for them.

(This question evidentially hit a sore point with the system as following comments got louder)

Class: It’s not fair! My dad doesn’t have to pay for someone else’s welfare from his job.
Me: Oh, no? What do you think some of the State and Federal income taxes do?

Class dismissed!...
P.S. Mr. Fuji got to keep his $100

Friday, April 06, 2007

Nobody Will Forget This Lesson...

I was sure the following was just another urban legend until I checked it out on Snopes.com

-----

In September of 2005, a social studies schoolteacher from Arkansas did something not to be forgotten. On the first day of school, with permission of the school superintendent, the principal, and the building supervisor, she took all of the desks out of the classroom. The kids came into first period, they walked in; there were no desks. They obviously looked around and said, "Where's our desks?"

The teacher said, "You can't have a desk until you tell me how you earn them."

They thought, "Well, maybe it's our grades."

"No," she said.

"Maybe it's our behavior."

And she told them, "No, it's not even your behavior."

And so they came and went in the first period, still no desks in the classroom. Second period, same thing. Third period. By early afternoon television news crews had gathered in the class to find out about this crazy teacher who had taken all the desks out of the classroom. The last period of the day, the instructor gathered her class.

They were at this time sitting on the floor around the sides of the room. She said, "Throughout the day no one has really understood how you earn the desks that sit in this classroom ordinarily. Now I'm going to tell you."

She went over to the door of her classroom and opened it, and as she did 27 U.S. veterans, wearing their uniforms, walked into that classroom, each one carrying a school desk. And they placed those school desks in rows, and then they stood along the wall. By the time they had finished placing the desks, those kids for the first time I think perhaps in their lives understood how they earned those desks.

Their teacher said, "You don't have to earn those desks. These guys did it for you. They put them out there for you, but it's up to you to sit here responsibly, to learn, to be good students and good citizens, because they paid a price for you to have that desk, and don't ever forget it."

-----


Thursday, April 05, 2007

Pre-Teen Tattle Tales…

G6

If there’s anything worse than Kindergarten tattlers, it’s got to be tattling 6th graders. The group I had today was infested with them.

All day I heard:

“Can you tell him/her to stop bugging me?…”
“She said…”
"He said…”
“She did…”
“He did…”

Now I expect it from Kindergarten and 1st graders, but it’s especially irksome the older they get. The kicker was during the last half hour “free time” before the dismissal bell, when one boy runs up to me with urgent, important information:

Stud: Can you go tell Monica to stop telling rumors that I “like” her?
Me: Why?

Stud: Because it’s not true!
Me: …and this is causing problems how?

Stud: Because my girl friend believes it and is mad at me now!
Me: How old are you?

Stud: “Twelve”, he replies with a smirkin’ grin.
(…insert my long, astonished look here…)

Me: Oh, just go away…

Boy, am I glad it’s a minimum day and the start of Spring break week...