Hotel Maid Service...

With the school holiday travel season coming, here's something to think about...

The First Impressions SA …

G4

Even though the class didn’t earn (they were close!) the extra homework essay assignment today, one fourth grader asked if she could write the “SA” anyway.

Any kid that wants to write anything is a winner in my book, so she spent the last 15mins of silent reading time composing the following:


It’s true.

I don’t laugh very much…in school.

I don’t smile a lot…in school.

But, outside of school I’m a real fun guy. Just ask my grandkids.

What Do Teachers Make?

By Taylor Mali
www.taylormali.com


He says the problem with teachers is, "What's a kid going to learn
from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher?"

He reminds the other dinner guests that it's true what they say about
teachers:

That those who can, do; those who can't, teach.

What! Are You Nuts?…

That comment was from Claudette when she heard I accepted an assignment to sub for…Kindergarten...the day after Halloween.

I accepted the afternoon class in Kindergarten for a couple of reasons.

Kindergarten isn’t at the top of my preferred assignment list, but I feel that I should try a Kinder class at least once each school year to see if my bias for the upper grade levels is still valid.

The real reason I accepted the assignment was that I hit the wrong button choice on the automated caller system. So instead of declining the assignment and expecting to hear a menu of “reason for declining” selections, I heard a confirmation message giving me the assignment number and time to show up.

Even before the kids arrived for class, I knew I was in for an interesting afternoon. On the class attendance list there were twins named (…and I kid you not) “Knowledge” and “Wisdom”.

I could be wrong but I can only speculate twenty or thirty years from now, the encounters these kids might have with their unusual monikers:

“Welcome to “Are You Smarter Than A 5^th Grader”! On the show today, we have Knowledge from California. She’ll be playing for the big prize and with a name like hers; we have a sure winner…”

“President Wisdom, are you sure invading Canada is the best way to solve Universal Health Care?...”

These kids will eventually reach adulthood. As adults, they will probably marry and have children of their own. They will more likely than not want to give those children names.

If so, my only wish for these future parents is that better “knowledge” of American culture will give them the “wisdom” to choose names that won’t cause awkwardness and difficulties as their kids grow and mature.

P.S. The twenty Kinders drove me nuts today. My bias for the upper grade levels remains intact.

How Y2K (partially) caused "Global Warming"...

A series of four video presentations on YouTube by a geologist that makes sense to me. He says we should be worrying more about a coming global cooling period instead of warming.

Each video is about 10min each so you might want to view it off hours.

Interestingly, the last video brings up a small bit about how Y2K contributed to faulty data sets being used in climate models to predict global warming "science".

http://ker-plunk.blogspot.com/2007/10/professor-bob-carter-demolishes-current.html
Thanks to Darren at ROTLC for the link to Professor Carter's presentation.

(I haven't viewed Gore's movie that I checked out of the public library yet. I try to get to it after I catch up on my TIVO'ed "Ugly Betty" shows)

Note to Self…

G5

Today’s lesson plan entry: “The narration for the story: (it doesn’t matter title) is in the CD player and ready to go".

Note to any/all newbie substitute teachers:

Always, always, always play a portion of any tape/CD/Video indicated on the lesson plan to make sure the equipment is plugged in, actually works and, more importantly, the media is actually the one meant for the class to see and hear.

Had I not followed my own advice today, the kids would have heard a portion of gangsta rap “music” lyrics that was mostly “Motha’ F*&#in’ this … Motha’ F*&#in’ that…” followed by something about “cappin’ this or crackin’ something else…”

I didn’t take note of the album title or artist. I was pretty sure the CD had nothing to do with reading lesson for today. I turned it off and waited for the teacher to return from the office after making some copies I needed to use for today’s class.

When she returned, I said “I don’t believe the correct CD is in the player for the reading lesson”

She opens the CD player tells me: “Umm, right. Uh, it’s my brothers CD”.

I’m not sure that “ownership” of the CD would have mattered all that much to anyone in the school administration office had thirty kids started spreading the story of “What we heard during reading time today!”

Hold It Drill…

G4

Disaster drills are a fact of school life.

Every school in the country has the “Fire” and “Code Red Intruder” drills. In the old days there used to be that third emergency drill, but the chances of surviving a nuclear attack huddled under radiation proof wooden desks have been pretty much proven pointless.

Here in California we don’t have to worry about hurricane, tornado or floods but we do have the “Earthquake Drill”.

As a substitute teacher, I’m supposed to know the procedures in what to do during all of these drill emergencies. While I do know the basics, some of the more nit picky details change from year to year. This year is no exception.

The basics of “Earthquake Drill is:

· Duck and cover under desks. (…this used to be nuclear attack protection step #1)

· Assess and document any injuries.

· Move the kids out of the room in small groups.

· Roll Call.

· Wait for the “all clear”.

My updated emergency briefing this morning was instruction on how to fill out the damage (presumably while the building is still rockin’) report. I then have to wait (presumably while the building is crumbling down) until someone comes to the classroom to pick up “said form” to return to the official in charge.

(Note that while the kids are still “ducking and covering”, I’m walking around taking notes without even so much as a hard hat.)

We are then supposed to wait until someone comes back to tell us to leave the building in an orderly, quiet manner. In groups of five, they walk to a designated assembly area away from the building where I call a 2nd kid inventory.

Today’s “scheduled surprise disaster” was supposed to come off sometime around 09:00am when, according the lesson plan, 60% of the students in this class were in other classrooms for math while being replaced with kids from two other classes.

Guess how accurate the “emergency roll call inventory” report would be during the real thing? So for the sake of simplicity, the other 4^th grade teachers decided to delay the math lesson until after the drill.

The scheduled earthquake didn’t hit until 09:45am this morning. The kids didn’t exit the building for another 10 minutes, while the emergency paperwork was completed and transported to disaster central.

With the entire school successfully assembled in their designated disaster lines, we re-inventory heads to establish that nobody remained in the building. Now we’re left waiting for the “all clear” announcement.

We wait 5…10…15…20…TWENTY-FIVE minutes before they called it a success.

The delay, it seems, was due to the inability of the other nineteen schools to execute this synchronize district wide evacuation plan in one massive, coordinated effort.

I’m just glad that my 4^th graders had good bladder control because the school bathrooms were off limits for the duration.

One Kindergarten teacher, on the other hand, wasn’t so fortunate.

One of her little guys really, really had to go and her request for an emergency bathroom exception was turned down which resulted in a predictable result.

I would have really liked to listen in on the phone call home to “Mom” explaining the reason why little Billy needed a change of underwear and pants today.

Amnesty …

I sometimes don’t understand the goal or reasoning of some parents in the determined effort to burden their own child with thee most unique, original, inventive, odd, whimsical, quirky, eccentric or tongue twister fanciful name.

When taking the roll in class: “Is Amnesty here?”

I have to wonder if it’s just a case of the usual “it sounded pretty” choice or a family celebrating the change in legal residency status that saddled this little girl.

Student Issues…

I seem to be stuck in the same school lately. Last week was all 5^th grades. This week it’s all 4^th grades and starting Monday it’s 6^th grade. I’m not really complaining. It’s a pretty good school with mostly reasonably, happy kids.

Yesterday’s 4^th grade lesson plan was appended with a note from the teacher about three particular student issues:

R. has ADHD and has behavior issues.

D. does not follow directions well and needs to be constantly reminded to “get back on task”

A. Likes to wander out of her seat and get into other peoples business.

I lucked out in that “D.” was absent and all I had to do with “R.” was call out his name a few times to bring him back to a tolerable level of disruptive behavior.

Then we come to Miss “A”.

How should I describe her? The teacher “issue report” on her is dead on accurate. I predict that she’ll be a future clone of “Miss Issipi” in just two short years from now.

If for any reason the classroom door was open, she had an uncanny ability to dematerialize from her seat and reappear standing just outside the classroom trying to get attention from anyone out on the black top.

If I turned my back or had to help another student for more than a few seconds, I’d turn back around and, more often than not, see the empty desk where Miss “A” was last seen.

The only school related activity she actually seemed to engage in was: “writing”.

During “journal writing” time, I observed a note being passed back and forth between Miss “A” and the girl next to her. My previous experience with classroom notes sometimes reveals more than I should know about the maturity levels of today’s youth.

Evidentially, Miss “A” was attempting to double team the boy of her interest by getting her friend to convince him to “Get with Miss A or…”, when I interrupted the note composition before her friend could complete the “or else” plea.

As I was walking back to the teacher’s desk with the note in hand, Miss “A” asks: “Can I have it back at the end of class?”

With a “no-ing” look, I let her know that she wasn’t getting it back and stapled the original to my “end of day” teacher’s report…

The Brewing Unseen Storm?

I got my first paycheck for this new school year. It’s been a long 44 day payroll period wait but the check is looking pretty good because this has been a busy year so far.

…And that predicted unseen storm brewing over the horizon mentioned in the last post? It might be coming in the week after next. I agreed to take a 6^th grade class for an entire week…for a teacher I haven’t worked for before.

The unknown is SO exciting…

Who Wants To This Job -- FOR FREE??

From: WTOV9

"...HARRISON COUNTY, Ohio -- Local parents said they were shocked and outraged to hear that a man who was acting as a substitute teacher during the Harrison Hills teacher strike was never hired by the district.

A school resource officer from the Harrison County Sheriff’s Department told NEWS9 that Frederick Saunders of Youngstown acted as a seventh-grade social studies substitute teacher for several days at Harrison Junior High.Saunders was charged with misdemeanor assault after police said he hit a picketer with his car on Tuesday, Oct. 2.

Then the school district made a big discovery; it says Saunders was never hired.Superintendent Jim Drexler released a statement to NEWS9; where said Saunders made it through security and apparently was working as a teacher, even though the district had never hired him.Many parents who talked to NEWS9 said they were shocked.“

How do they know there's not somebody else that's not supposed to be there, that wasn't hired?" said Cindy Sinquefield of Scio.
-----

Just why someone would WANT to fake being a substitute teacher is a mystery but the fact that someone could show up at a school posing as a substitute teacher isn't all that far fetched.

In the four years I've been walking into school offices, I've never had to actually show any identification to verify that I am who I say I am.

They might ask who I am to match with a list of who they are expecting. They might ask who I'm there for to match with someone who they know is out and has a sub coming in. There have been a few times that the phone system garbled the teacher's name bad enough that I could only identify the school and grade level I was assigned. Even in these instances, I've never had to actually show any actual identification to verify who I was.

But...the REAL question here is: Who would want to impersonate a substitute teacher for several days...in a middle school... and... not get paid for it?

That's just three times, plain insane!

Substitute Vacation …

I haven’t posted anything about school since last week because, quite frankly, the three 5^th grade classes I had on Monday, Tues and Friday didn’t provide any problems, illnesses, tribulations, vexations or funniness that would make for interesting reading.

It then struck me that I should say when things DO go as expected otherwise it’s like the national news that report only the bad, catastrophic stuff.

Sooo…Last week was like a vacation. The kids in all three classes at two different schools were excellent and fun to be with. I had a great time.

Kind of like a sunny vacation before the unseen storm brewing over the horizon makes landfall…

CA Health Insurance Rant…

With the exception of government and some other highly unionized professions (education, auto makers, etc), the employer paid health insurance ends when you leave your employer (or your employer leaves you!).

The few times I found myself between jobs in my previous career, we had no problems signing up for a policy from one of the “Big Blue” named insurance carriers to protect us from a potential catastrophic health event.

That was before we got “old”.

After the last layoff, I found that being over the age of 55 was a definite problem for the “Big Blue” Insurance Co. who happily took our check just a few years earlier. After some negotiation and intervention by our insurance agent, they reluctantly accepted us back as an insured couple. We were, once again, covered for any catastrophic event over the first $5000.00 deductible.

Then the rates started going up like clockwork every six months. We countered by adjusting our definition of “catastrophic event” to mean anything over $7500.00 in the futile effort to just “maintain” the cost of insurance. For this coverage we paid “Big Blue” approx $6000.00/yr

If you do the math, you would see that we were spending $13k before we get any help to cover a major health problem.

One of the reasons I started substitute teaching was to cover insurance costs for just such an event. There are 180 teaching days in a year for a max potential income of about $18k (after taxes) per year.

Since subs on call rarely work all possible schools days, my experience these last four years has been that subbing will bring in approx $7k-$10k per year.

When the “Big Blue” insurance co. notified us late last year of yet another increase to $760/month, we started hunting for a more affordable alternative.

We found an insurance company located in the Mid-West, hence forth to be referred to as Crap Ass National, Inc.

The agent for CA described her company’s coverage as a $5000 deductible (per scheduled incident) policy for the same price as our “Big Blue” policy before the latest rate increase.

With over 30 years experience dealing with employer PPO plans and additional downtime years with “Big Blue”, I thought I knew how the system was supposed to and did work. In the four years since the layoff, we had no health issues that even came close to the deductible limits. Other than semi-yearly rate increases, there were no surprises.

The CA National plan sounded good to us, so we signed on the dotted line and felt we had an “ok” deal.

That was until we had our first major event covered under CA National.

I got a call, one day, last June that Claudette had fainted in the beauty salon and that the paramedics and ambulance had been called. By the time I got there, she had regained consciousness and was strapped to a gurney to be transported to the hospital for further tests.

The resulting diagnosis and cause was: vasovagal syncope. In layman’s terms: “fainted – no apparent reason”. Evidentially I also have vasovagal syncope because I sometimes faint when I get shots.

Three months later we get the bills.

Ambulance: $1,896.00

Hospital ER: $13,450.00

Ok, Ok, that’s a lot of money but we’re covered, right? This should cost me only my five grand deductible and the rest is up to CA National – Right??.

Not exactly!

It seems that the ambulance isn’t a network provider, therefore not covered. CA National doesn’t pay for anything not on their “schedule of allowed medical treatments” and only up to a company specified limit of the procedures that ARE allowed.

After the insurance PPO discounts, disallowed coverage and limits of the allowed stuff, CA National cut a check for exactly $1000.

CA National then sent us a notice of an insurance rate increase of $800/year and leaving me holding the remaining bills for $8800.00

I called CA National to ask what happened to my “five thousand deductible” limitation.

It seems that I hadn’t been diligent in reading and understanding all the fine print that the agent, selling me the policy, glossed over.

(I know this post is long and boring to most people, but it lets me blow off a little steam…)

But there IS some good news. After contacting the ambulance company and the hospital on my own, I was able to negotiate a 25% discount off both bills, just for asking!

I also discovered that the hospital offers an “uninsured patient” discount which happens to be just about the same amount that ALL the insurance companies get as a PPO discount. This means that had I not had insurance, I would be paying about the same amount as I am paying with CA National except that I wouldn’t have wasted thousands of dollars paying premiums.

Needless to say, we aren’t going to remain a client with CA National.

If “National Health Care” is going to be the driving issue in the next presidential election, I have a few ideas to propose.

It’s clear to me that what this country needs is LESS insurance industry involvement in our health care and more individual control on what we spend and how spend it.

I propose the following:

1. Allow anyone to establish a tax deductible Health Savings Account (HSA) without the requirement that it be tied to a health insurance company policy. Require that the money from the account can only be spent on health care or additional private health insurance only.

2. Have our benevolent government cover the costs of any catastrophic medical conditions in excess of some large deductible, like say $20k/year.

This should allow “we the people” the choice on how to save or spend our own resources for actual medical, dental and/or additional insurance to offset the huge government deductible.

I’d vote for a guy or harpy running for office with something like this idea in mind!!!

ADAH …

My week long assignment in 6^th grade is finally over. It’s been a long week to say the least. One kid, who was MIA most of last week and this, showed up on Wednesday.

Just my luck, he’s part of the clown crowd of the previously identified “Beatles” (John, Paul, George and a 4^th whose name isn’t Ringo but DOES end in ‘O’) and the sassy girl.

I swear, if these six aren’t already diagnosed with one of those popular 3-4 letter acronym mental syndromes, I’d offer to make a case for this one: ADAH (Attention Deficient A$$ Holes).

It’s draining to repeat the same phrase over and over and over all day long.

“(Insert ADAH kid name here)! (Insert one of the following)!”

· “Sit Down!”

· “Stop talking!”

· “Stop Interrupting!”

· “Leave him/her alone!”

· “Why are you wandering the room?”

· “No, you can’t eat Froot Loops in class!”

· “Stop throwing that!”

· “Get off the floor!”

· “Clean up your mess!”

· “Get your book out!”

· “Start working!”

· “Get back to work!”

· “No, I don’t have an (extra pencil/ paper/ paper clip/ eraser)

For the final writing assignment, I had them write a personal letter:

---

Dear, Ms. Teacher

We are glad you’re back! Let me tell you what’s been happening the two weeks you’ve been gone…

---

Most of the letters were of the “compare and contrast” styles of the four substitute teachers they’ve had these last two weeks.

The worst of the ADAH “Beatles” kids wrote (and I’m paraphrasing with intentional misspelling here because it’s true)”

Dear, Ms. Teacher

We are glad you’re back! Let me tell you what’s been happening the two weeks you’ve been gone.

We’ve had four subseetoots and it was real noisey. The wors one was Mr. Homework. He is really mean. Please, please, please, never, never, never, never, (repeat another 10-15 nevers) have Mr. Homework subseetoot for us agan!

Sinserly, (The worst of the Beatles)

For the first time this week, kid I totally agree…

Carnival of Education update 138

Free admission to the Carnival of Education #138 is now open!

Miss Issippi…

Well, I’m back in the 6^th grade class with the backed-up plumbing problems (now fixed) from last week and I’m not sure if I’ll survive the rest of the week. It seems that they have had a diet of three other subs since I was here last.

They chewed up one sub a day since last Tuesday and couldn’t seem to get anyone to come back for a repeat performance. That should either be flattering that they want me back for four days straight or I’m missing a big clue as why no one seems to want to take more than a single day with these guys.

Maybe it’s the lack of lesson plans, an over abundance of “bad actors” in the class or they aren’t as desperate for a big check this month to put a dent in some unexpected medical expenses due to the crappy health insurance policy we switched to last year (…more about that in a future blog posting).

A fantastic teacher spent over 45mins this morning generating lesson plans for me to cover the rest of the week so I’m not left hanging. I’ve subbed for this guy before and will take his class any time he asks.

But for what ever reason I find myself here this week, I’m glad that 25% of the assignment is now over.

I got so tired of hammering on the Beatles guys (John, Paul, George and a 4^th whose name isn’t Ringo but DOES end in ‘O’) and a sassy girl with a cutesy name of a state in the U.S.of A. that I kinda lost my control of the class.

After she slammed a book down on her desk after I told her to stop knitting (yes, the yarn and needles thing) and get back to work, I kicked her out to the office for being disrespectful. I tried to notify the office but no one was answering so I went on with the lesson.

Fifteen minutes later, “Montana” returns and tells me a tale about talking with the principal, apologetic contrition, and promises to behave and being allowed to return to class. This is out of character for the principle I know who is pretty tough on class clowns, but “what the hey?” Maybe he’s got too much on his plate today to deal with “Virginia”

Since I couldn’t contact the office by phone earlier, I stopped on the way to lunch to let the office know why I booted “Carolina” earlier in the day.

The secretary looked confused and asked who I had sent. When I repeated the name, the secretary said that “Ohio” HAD come to the office in the morning and said she was here to pick up more raffle tickets for the sale and then returned to class.

Miss “California” was then called out of the lunch room to have a “real” conversation with the principal.

Now that she knows that I do talk with the office staff about what goes on in the classroom, we’ll see what stories “Miss Issippi” will come up with in the next three days.

Far Out!

You know you’re old when the slang of your youth has been elevated to a "Idioms and Clichés" worksheet.

…and not even ONE fifth grader had ever heard the term “Far Out!” before.

For the record, the kids couldn’t match ANY of the following...DOH!

(click to enlarge):

Backed Up …

I just love a lesson plan that starts off: “These kids can be quite noisy at times”.

The teacher who called me Sunday night didn’t mention that item of information when she asked me to take her 6^th grade class for Monday morning. She saved it for…Monday morning…SURPRISE!!.

Well, it’s only one day and I had a pretty complete lesson plan to work from. By the time the kids figure out that I’m all bluff, it’ll be over and I can walk away free and clean.

Of the thirty 6^th graders, she has five boys and one girl that are the driving force behind the class turmoil. If it wasn’t for the “tainted six”, this class would be a dream.

I sat hard and tight on all six…all day. We made it to the end of the day in pretty good shape and nobody ended up crying or composing a “Kill List”.

As I’m packing up to leave, the office calls down to ask if I can take the class again tomorrow. The teacher has contracted some kind of infection of the thyroid and is on her way to the hospital. She’s seriously sick so I agree knowing that I’ll have to come up with a lesson plan for tomorrow. Something I haven’t done before so therefore so it’s probably doomed from the start

With the help of two other 6^th grade teachers, we come up with a lot of work to fill the day. Only the math section is a logical extension of the previous day. The rest is mostly reading and writing stuff till the dismissal bell.

The “tainted six” are corralled by having their names on the board in a box labeled “The LIST”. I haven’t told them what the list means. The longer I delay telling them, the implied threat seems to have their attention…especially after I put check marks after each offenders name when he/she forgets I have “The LIST”.

By lunch time, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Near the end of our 40min lunch, one of the male teachers exits the teachers lounge bathroom and asks one of the female teachers to go in and flush one of the toilets in the womens room.

She returns right quick. “There’s black water backing up in both toilets!”

A check in the student bathrooms confirms that the plumbing is seriously compromised campus wide.

Back in the classroom, I tell the kids: “I’ve got some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that all the restrooms are closed because sewage is backing up in the plumbing”

The kids ask: “So what’s the GOOD news?”

“The good news is that I won’t have honor any further requests to “go to the bathroom” for the rest of the day AND requests for “drinks of water” will be discouraged due to the bathrooms being closed”

One of the “tainted six”, one that’s had an unusually weak bladder today, later told me that the toilets were backed up with “black water” since the 10:00am recess.

Evidentially neither he nor any of the other 785 kids on campus thought that was worth mentioning to any adult on the school grounds.

Fortunately, I’m not working there tomorrow or Friday due to advance scheduling. I’m busy for the rest of the week…or at least until the plumbing gets fixed.

Kill List…

After subbing the first two full weeks of the new school year, this week came down to just this one assignment on the last day of the week. It started as just another typical 5^th grade class of thirty kids.

The teacher had left one actual spelling test and a pile of typical “time killer” worksheets to fill the academic day. The kids were restless but not really out of hand. It was a little more talkative than I care for, but the threat of “extra homework” had its usual temporary calming affect.

If it weren’t for that single incident, this day would have passed unnoticed, unremembered and forgotten as soon as I drove from the parking lot at day end.

The “incident” was a worksheet that one boy brought to me about 30mins before the dismissal bell.

On the back of the worksheet was a hand written list containing the names of three boys and three girls in the class with the title:

“KILL LIST”

I quietly called the worksheet owner (his name was on the front) over to the teacher’s desk and out of hearing range of the other kids.

I quietly asked if this worksheet was his. It was.

I asked him if he had written the list on the back. He had.

I asked him what this list was. He said it was a list of kids in class he didn’t like.

I was stunned. This boy is one of the smallest, skinniest and probably one of the smarter kids in this class…AND HE’S ONLY 10!!

I’m almost positive he didn’t actually mean anything by his use of the word “kill” but since he did use it, I can’t ignore it. With all the post-Columbine incidents involving kids and violence in schools I couldn’t take the chance even if it’s a small one.

I quietly said: “You know I have to show this to your teacher, don’t you?”

He just nodded and started tearing up. I quietly told him to return to his desk and he spent the rest of the time, head down, quietly crying until the final bell.

After everyone left, I took “the list” to the principal and told her that this is something she needs to know about. After making a copy, she thanked me for bringing it to her attention and said she’d be contacting the parents that same afternoon.

I’m at a loss for words as how stunned I feel right now. I hope the list was just as he described: “kids in class he didn’t like” and nothing more.

Where Did U.S. History Go?…

Maybe I wasn’t paying attention but, when did the “History” book become a “Social Studies” book? At least some U.S. History was listed in the lesson plan under “Social Studies” for last Fridays 5^th grade class. Not in the book, but a 1996 video titled:

Three Worlds Meet
Origins – 1620
Vol 1

The back cover synopsis:

“History comes to life in this dynamic series for grades 5-12. A comprehensive study of U.S. History from the earliest Native Americans to the Cold War years following WWII”

Had any of the kids been paying attention to the video (they weren’t), it could have been summarized as follows:

“The invading Christian conqueror, Christopher Columbus, intentionally spread small pox, other diseases, new invasive plant life, harmful animal life and slavery to the lands of the peaceful natives of the newly discovered continent…”

Not quite the same as taught in the HISTORY classes of the 1960’s. No mention of Columbus’s famous ships: the Nina, Pinta and Santa Maria in this video. Not relevant I guess.

How many of you remember learning this oldie in school?

In fourteen hundred and ninety-two
Columbus sailed the ocean blue.
He took three ships with him, too,
And called aboard his faithful crew.
Mighty, strong and brave was he
As he sailed across the open sea.
Some people still thought the world was flat!
Can you even imagine that?

Class dismissed…